After living in Thailand for a while, you here this quote quite often, “she’s a good Thai girl man, she’s not like the others ” – Every delusional expat living in Thailand with a Thai GF.
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So this got me thinking, maybe there should be some sort of scoring system to see rate how good of a Thai girl your actual Thai GF is? I have devised a completely retarded scoring system to rate your ‘good Thai girl friend’ to see if she is wife material, friends with benefits, relationship material or something else. This is just a bit of fun btw, before anyone gets there knickers in a twist.
The good Thai girl test
The scoring is broken down into two parts, personality and attractiveness.The scoring system is pretty easy to understand.
Is she stuck up–Meaning is your Thai GF a bitch? Does she hate girls for no reason, or always tries try keep out the sun to keep white? Is she annoyed if you eat street food instead of going to some overpriced Japanese buffet? Score this out of 2. 0 being very stuck up, 2 being not stuck up at all.
Is she sensible and independent- Is she always playing stupid games and “testing” you to see what you will do or react? Or is she good Thai wife material and hardly ever gets angry over the smallest of things? Factor in how much of her salary she saves if any, or if she pisses it down Watson’s on overpriced makeup.How much of her lifestyle do yo fund? Score this out of /2. 0 not very sensible, 2 very sensible.
Note: if she has ever hinted and doing something “un-thinkable” if you two broke up as a scare tactic, she scores a 0 by default.
Is she classy – How classy is your good Thai girl? Is she always polite and never swears? When you take her out she doesn’t get overly drunk and vomits? Does she eat som tam at your condo in the squat position or on a chair? Score this out of 2. 0 being not very classy , 2 being very classy.
note: if she slurps her noodles or eats crossed legged on the floor at your condo, scoring is to be capped at 1.
Her understanding of English and western culture- This is a big one, can she speak English well, and understand what you’re saying? Or is she the type of girl who always says I cannot explain or I don’t know how to say? Is she aware of what sarcasm is or can understand when you need to spend time with your “boys” and away from her annoying s***? Score this out of 2. 0 being her not having a good understanding, 2 her having a very good understanding.
Is she fun- If a girl is not fun, she can’t be Thai wife material.Nobody wants to be that 60 year old BHTL expat who goes out with his Thai wife and never say a word to each other as they eat dinner awkwardly for 1 hour. Does she want to go out and do things and be active, or would she rather sit at home all day playing Candy Crush, Cookie Run, and sending all her friends lie (Line) stickers 24/7? Does she make you laugh, can she be spontaneous, or think outside the box? Score this out of 2. 0 being not fun at all, 2 being very fun.
Okay now the personality is out the way, now comes the looks.
Her face – How does her face look, is she a good looking Thai girl? Is she a young Thai girl who is pimple free? How do her feet look? (oops weird fetish alert). Score this out of 3, 0 being ugly, 3 being very hot.
Figure – Does she have a nice body, or is she a stick insect? Is she over/under 50kg? How does she look in a dress or bikini? Score this out of 2. 0 having no figure, 2 having a good figure.
Note: if your Thai GF is over 50kg, she can not score more than 1.5 by default. Unless she is over 5’10.
Ass and boobs– I can’t see many good Thai girls scoring a three here, but who knows, some of you dudes maybe dating ladyboys. Does your Thai GF have a nice bottom and boobies? Score this out of 3. 0 having no ass or boobies, 3 having good ass and boobies. (aint no Thai girl scoring a 3 here, aint no girl!)
Her voice – How does her voice sound? Is it an annoying Thai voice that makes you want to slit a cats throat, or does she have the voice of a perfect Thai wife, soft and relaxing? Score this out of 1. 0 having a annoying voice, 1 good voice.
Is she from Bangkok? If so give her 1 point, otherwise she scores 0. (50km radius from Bangkok is acceptable.
So now count up your scores and plot along the graph below to see where your good Thai girl lands. Did she land in that elusive Thai wife standard? Let us know where your current good Thai GF landed in the comment below! This is obviously a joke and not to be taken seriously btw.