The South East Asia City Breakdown

You, an aspiring heterosexual male, ready to leave your mother’s tit and make the move to Asia.

A move you’ve been planning for months, maybe even years.

As you fiddle downstairs trying to find your peanut size balls to make the jump, a question you’ll ask yourself is Which city in Asia should I move to?

So I created this guide.

I have picked 4 cities that in my opinion offer the best options for life your desired lifestyle.

Each city will be rated on the following:

  • Lifestyle
  • Cost of living
  • Girls
  • Visa situation

Note: if you hate Bangkok, you’re about to be triggered. 

1. Bangkok

Bangkok is the best city in South East Asia.

No other city in South East Asia comes close.

I know dozens of you will reply in the comments and tell me that Bangkok sucks, and it’s not the best city in Asia.

But that’s because you’re biased.

If you polled an infinite number of males who have been all over South East Asia, and asked them which city in South East Asia is best, Bangkok would come out #1 in that poll.

Lifestyle

Bangkok is the number one city in South East Asia because you can live any kind of lifestyle you want.

Whether you’re the $700 a month starter phaggot who left his country a 22 and is trying to make his way through adulthood (that’s me), or the 10k a-day baller who wants to live in a Penthouse and dine out at the best restaurants in the world (Bangkok has several) – you can.

Spending $10,000 per month in Bangkok is VERY EASY because you have hundreds of gourmet restaurants, lavish bars, spas, penthouses, events and more.

There are so many ways to buy pleasure.

Good luck trying to spend $3,000 per month in Laos or Cambodia.

Bangkok is a city with millions of options.

500 gyms to choose from. 5,000 restaurants to choose from. 5 million girls to choose from.

And you have the BTS and MRT which will get you anywhere in Bangkok in about 30 minutes. The only place in South East Asia that has a metro system (Yes I know Singapore and Malaysia have metro systems too, but don’t nobody wanna live there.)

Taxis are cheap and the main airport is a hub to most places in Asia.

Cost of living

I think I explained that well above. You can live here from as little as $700>.

Girls

Thai girls are beautiful. Second best city in South East Asia to meet girls after Manila. Thai girls are so friendly and easy to get on with, they have a low barrier of entry meaning you can be a total loser and Thai girls will still talk to you.

If you love happy ending massages and soapies, then they are easy to find

Whether you want to pay for play, or play Cassanova – you can live out all your fantasies.

Visa

this is where Thailand lets itself down. You can only stay in the country for 90 days (unless you have a shit passport then you get less) before having to leave and re-enter. Not a deal breaker though.

2. Ho Chi Minh

I love Ho Chi Minh and it’s my number one city in South East Asia… if you plan on staying for less than 2 weeks.

Lifestyle

to grab a cup of coffee in HCM you gotta risk your life at least 8 times, I’m not joking.

#streetlife

A post shared by EYEVOYAGE (@eyevoyage) on

Crossing roads is no fun, and each time you do it could be your last.

There is noise everywhere too, no peace and quiet in condos for the most part unless you want to live a little further out the main area.

They are fixing this by having gated communities with private parks, they awesome but sadly a little far away from the center, and the cultural vibes are close to 0% in these communities. It’s like being back in the west.

Ho Chi Minh is not a first-tier city yet, it’s getting there but it may take 5-10 more years.

There are not enough bars, club, gyms, restaurants or new areas to explore.

Yes, I know Vietnamese food is great and everywhere, but sometimes you just want a juicy rib-eye steak or some amazing Mexican food, in which case you’ll have two pick between 2 restaurants.

Things get repetitive quick, and you don’t have that whole first world vibe going that you do with Bangkok.

When was the last time Just Bieber or Coldplay toured Vietnam?

Never, that’s when.

Cost of living

Cost of living on average is lower than Bangkok and Manila. However, if you make good money and want to spend that cheddar on good food, drinks, gyms and the rest, you’re shit out of luck.

But if you don’t want to enjoy the finer things in life, HCM offers great value. I like to cook a lot of my own food and the last time I visited it was impossible to find western supermarkets that sold imported quality cuts of meat or fish.

I may sound negative but I really do like Ho Chi Minh, amazing city but sadly Bangkok has spolit me.

Girls

Vietnamese girls are beautiful. Maybe the best in Asia in terms of cultural and traditional values. If you like the girl next door, or like traditional Asian girls who never do wrong or is too shy to hands with guys, Vietnam is the place to find them.

If you’re coming here to spin plates and date lots of girls

bad time meme

Ho Chi Minh is modern but if you want to play most of your days playing the field, visit Bangkok or Manila. If you want to settle down with a sweet local girlfriend, then visit Vietnam.

If you want to spin some plates, visit Jakarta, Manila or Bangkok and not HCM.

HCM does have some massage options, but they aren’t as easy to find as Manila or Bangkok and freelancers in nightclubs will often end up scamming you.

Visa situation

Visa situation in Vietnam is like Thailand, if you pay a bit more money you can get a 1-year visa for around $1,000.

2. Manila

Wait I thought Ho Chi Minh was #2?

They are both #2 for different reasons.

Lifestyle

You can live a pretty good lifestyle in Manila if you have money. If you plan to send $1,000<, then I would advise against coming here.

The city has lots of great dive bars, restaurants, clubs, and there’s enough first word condos, gyms, supermarkets to be able to ball out.

Condo prices are so high in safe zones, and you cannot find the $300 rooms in amazing locations that you can in Bangkok or HCM.

Manila’s biggest downfall is its traffic.

Well, the traffic in Bangkok is not that good either?”

If you just uttered this comment, Bangkok has a BTS system where you can get anywhere in 30 minutes. It also has motorbike drivers that will whizz your ass through traffic to anywhere you need to be for $4.

Manila has none of that, (it has a metro system but it’s not in the areas expats live).

Between the hours of 5pm to 11pm, you better check your black ass at home.

Manila traffic has gotten to the level that no traffic in a city should ever get to: full retard.

where to live in south east asia

3 hours to get anywhere, if a girl tells you she will be there at 5pm, she’s there at 9.

Manila does have one thing none of the rest of South East Asia have (Singapore does not count because nobody wants to live there), Bonifacio Global City (BGC,) a 3km area of Manila that looks like any top western city.

Streets are marked out in blocks, every restaurant is new, amazing gyms, nice (but expensive) condos, parks, and almost no crime because they have police with guns making you feel safe.

It’s the safest place in Manila, maybe the safest place in Asia?

Sadly it’s only 3km wide and beyond that, the streets, pollution, and smells get really bad.

Hello #manila #cityofdreams

A post shared by kuman55 (@kuman55) on

Leaving your condo is not fun because everything is just grey. It just brings your mojo down.

Oh and the food sucks. Least with Bangkok and Ho Chi Minh you have great street food you can eat for $2, in Manila, there is none of that.

How many Filipino restaurants have you seen in your life?

Zero, that’s how many.

Cost of living

Manila is 30%  more expensive than Bangkok in general, with condo prices being about 20-30% more than Bangkok. If you don’t like to cook (produce is limited because it’s an island) then your only option is to pay a lot to eat out every day.

You can’t do the $5 street food diet in Manila because there’s no good food.

Girls

Filipino girls are beautiful. If you want to date lots of girls and be a playboy, Manila is the best city in South East Asia to do that (even better than Bangkok).

As far as pay for play goes, Manila has several massage and freelancer options.

Visa situation:

You can pretty much stay in Manila for as long as you like. You just need to renew your visa which easy and fairly cheap.

4. Jakarta

Jakarta is a place for veterans. If you’ve not done a few years in South East Asia already, Jakarta will make you shit your pants.

There’s not too much to do there, and if you want to do it, there’s so much traffic that you can’t.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BgQFdongT1G/?tagged=jakartacity

Things are just too far apart and hard to reach. And Muslims.

Lifestyle

I’m not really sure how much of a lifestyle there is there, it’s way too hot in the day and there’s too much traffic at night.

Jakarta made my list simply because it’s for party-goers, if you love to get rekt then live here.

Bangkok used to have a very good club scene 6 years ago but nowadays it not as intense as so many clubs have closed. Jakarta has a great scene and the locals love to party hard.

It’s a very underrated city in that regard.

No other reasons to live here. Great for short visit and the local food is actually very good.

Girls

Indonesian girls are beautiful. They are so cute, friendly and caring. Some of them like to party too.

Their pay for play options are limited but you can still find them. Not as safe as Bangkok or Manila either so you’ll need some experience here.

Visa

There’s your full list of cities to live in South East Asia.

WTF Harvie, you missed out Singapore, Hanoi, Bali, Phuket, Chang Mai, Kuala Lumpur”

Lol, that’s a good one.

You don’t want to live there.

Phuket is an isolated island with very few direct flights to anywhere good (you almost always need to change at Bangkok or KL first), there is a lack of quality produce because of nothing good in shipped in. It’s super hard to get around the island without a motorbike or paying high fees for taxis. No food options unless you have in Patong.

Hanoi is quite nice, but to live there long term the place is just too damn small.

Chiang Mai, again too small.

Singapore, do you have $5 million dollars, lol did not think so.

Bali, too many bogans.

Don’t get it wrong, I enjoy all the cities I just shit on for holidays and vacations, they all offer things that Bangkok doesn’t (clear air, beaches), but long-term they don’t have the options or flexibility the cities above provide.

Your thoughts?

What are your top 3 cities in Asia?

30 Comments

Add a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *