Почему стоит уехать из Таиланда в 30 лет
At what point should you consider leaving Thailand?
If you want to leave with your mental health in check, you need to leave within 3-4 years of living here, or when you hit 30~.
“What, leave Thailand, are you crazy Harvie?”
Yes I am, and if you’ve been here 3 years or longer, chances are you are too.
In this article, I talk about why living in Thailand is great in your 20s, why it sucks in your 30s, a few lessons I’ve learned living here and a 13 question quiz that will reveal if you need to leave Thailand.
Disclaimer: you may get feelings of anxiety if you make it through the entire article.
Thailand is perfect for 20-year-olds
Thailand (and Asia) is the perfect place to live in your early and mid-20s.
Сайт cost of living is so cheap you can earn $700/month and be okay, or come here with a small amount of savings and make it last for years.
Living like a peasant in your 20s is encouraged, a shoe-string budget should want to motivate you to become financially free in your later years. I know lots of people who came here with little and now have more money than they know what to do with (thanks to the Internet).
You can easily visit nearby countries which are even cheaper than Thailand and explore the world on a budget. Every 20 something should do that.
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A really sobering article and in my opinion your best one to date. If you ever pack up and come back to England this article should be set as the landing page as a mental health warning to fellow human beings.
‘Later I realized it’s not Thai or western girls that are the problem, it’s me.’
That statement really resonated with me as it also took me a while to come to that realisation. I freely admit that I am a fucked up person and thankfully I realised my faults and am now actively trying to better myself. The flipside to the loneliness in Thailand and being removed from the rat race of the Western world is that it gives you plenty of time for thought and reflection.
I have been back in the UK for nearly 2 years now and have been fighting a battle on wether I should make a life for myself here or return to Thailand. However since being back I hooked up with a childhood friend that has blossomed into a great relationship. Career is going well to as I am now working in aerospace and defence. Just over 2 years ago I was one of those ‘Western women are demons, the uk is the matrix, I hate people, I hate the world etc etc’. I thought Thailand was the answer and all the degenerate activities you have listed was my delusional vision of a happy life.
I first visited Thailand when I was 36, I had just come out of a toxic relationship with a girl much younger than me. I came for 2 weeks and stayed for a Month, I thought it was fucking disneyland, the best place in the world. 3 Months later I was back for another 2 week holiday (longest I could get off from work), I really enjoyed the time there but as is the norm it did not quite have the magic of the first trip. 6 Months later I quit my job and went back over, I had plenty of savings and I was going to attempt the transition into online work. Of course I could never get motivated, all I did was go to the gym in the day and party at night and spent ridiculous amounts of money each week. Through loneliness and also a family emergency I came back to the UK after 4 Months. I picked up a new contract for work that I could do remotely, so back to Thailand again. This time working UK hours online, thus earning big western bucks with the benefit of cheap living. Yet again I lasted 4 Months. All the degenerate behaviours and mental health issues that you have detailed in this article I had them all. Most people return home as they run out of money, I was just plain miserable and could feel my well being degenerating rapidly.
Don’t get me wrong, I still love Thailand and its people. The problem was I did not love myself and that problem followed me from the UK and did not go away. Will I go back one day? quite possibly, whist i am in a relationship I am not so sure as I think there are better destinations in the world to go as a couple. If I end up single later down the line I expect I will go back, however I will enjoy Thailand as a holiday destination only rather then attempting to live there. I still think it’s a great place for older guys to retire, especially if they have completed the milestones of having a family, being married etc. I hope I get to hit those milestones, living in Thailand throughout my 40’s would mean that I would probably give up on any hope of starting a family etc and It certainly would be a struggle to build a retirement fund.
Not a criticism but the article is targeted at guys coming over in there 20’s. It would be interesting to see the perspective from guys 40+ that have moved over to try and start a new life.
Great points Mark. I don’t think enough people in Thailand realize how important a childhood friendship is, you just can’t build that again. Another con of Thailand in your 30s is that you don’t see your friends or family as much as it’s very far away. Glad you could resonate.
I agree, come back at 55 when you’re fresh out of a divorce and hopefully a nice pension. 😀
– Dont underestimate the difficulty in returning to Farangland. I know a couple of guys who seem moderately happy with the move. They cant forget their years in SEA and secretly talk about abandon the farang families and relocate and set up shop for a second time in Thailand or Vietnam.
– Be sure that your choices arnt determined by other peoples expertations? Who need advise from nagging relatives that you dont even like?
– A meaningfull life can be achived in various ways. Be kind to your self. Life stress will ease big time when you turn 45-50.
– But if an enlightened – high work ethic -metoo inspired – hipster millenial- lifestyle – is what your Freudian subconscios force you to try. Then go for it.
Or maybe split your time between Bangkok and Europe? Friends and a family in both locations. Unorthodox for sure. But who gives a f**k.
I think Europe would be good as it’s easy to buy property there, and location wise is near almost everything, lots of price points and cities to choose from. Good place to look for a serious relationship if not already with someone.
100% agree and bkk is now the same price or more expenaive than say lisbon. All said and done are you leaving Thailand ?
I am considering my options, I need to see what fits me best for my life goals of buying a property, starting a business and good visa options. It’s safe to say I’ll be here for the next year at least.
Sorry. I don’t buy this. If you have been addicted to a life in Bangkok very few guys happily chose property and a traditional lifestyle with a traditional girl in Sofia, Oslo or Bristol? Yeak. Try to get traffic with a blog on this topic.
Very few heroin addicts turn vegan.
Try Norway for a year. Buy a “hytte” and write your take on fermented cod, frigidity and the best vinter tires when its – 30 below. Your advertisers will cry.
Too cold. Much rather go to the Mediterranean.
>I read one blog where the author suggests you get drunk before you meet a girl if she is boring in text chat.
This is literally me, but in Vietnam. Probably my blog too because I doubt many other people suggest this.
Anyway, I’m 24 and have lived in Vietnam the past 4 months. I’m still in the 1-3 year free pass (3 years seems a little long for a degen).
It’s funny you mention to leave when you’re 30. I literally told my friends and family the exact same thing. Don’t want to be one of those old dudes sitting on the small blue chairs with a wife he met at a girly bar. You know the people I’m talking about and they just never look happy.
Overall, 10/10 article.
Oh, my degen score is 5.33.
Yes it was yours. I was not trying to be rude or anything, just want to highlight things that are not healthy and can compound into something very bad. Maybe my next article should be on how to meet girls without losing your mind :).
Thanks for the kind words and stay safe out there.
I think that’d be a great article.
Meeting girls offline works best over here. Less crazies and more ‘good’ girls.
I think you are plateauing, youre in an expat phase that can last a while. It will pass. When youre 40 you will realize life just keep on getting better, all your worries will have been for nothing.
But there are some points that may be valid, like investing, you may be better off marrying a filipina so you can invest your money, i know several chinese and even some north africans who did and they did it real well. Thailand is not the best for business, and its already way too many foreigners trying, always someone new waiting to waste their savings and destroy for the rest in the process.
I think a mid-life crisis is more fitting than a plateau or one could argue they are the same thing. I believe we all should take inventory of our lives at 30 and ask ourselves what do we really want.
Ok if you think that, but midlife crisis is not real, its just the point, not a period, when men realise that they been emo dorks during their 30ies and decide to reclaim, or at least try to reclaim, their manhood. It follows naturally after spending ones 30ies raising kids. Childhood friends and all that emo crap becomes more irrelevant, you even start to think that other peoples kids are ugly (for “socially acceptable” reasons most will deny it but its still true). You should look forward to it =D
Harvie I think most people should only live in Thailand if they get a decent income . Thailand isn’t that cheap anymore more . I travel to Thailand four times a year . Most westerners people in Thailand never make real money . They would be better of in there own countrys and go to Thailand four times a year .
GREAT article. I love how very balanced and keeping it a reality, it is. This will most definitely something I will keep in mind when I come to Thailand .
The thing about me is, Asia is the only country I am interested in. I cannot go to Europe because I do NOT Want to be mistaken as the illegal migrants that are going around raping the locals there. I refuse to ever go back to US or go to any Anglo-Saxons nation. I do not care about Africa and I do not want to be mistaken as a local tribe and they hack me to death because they thought I was from some village some where, and there are many Afro hispanics in South America in which I am already subjected to classist discrimination. Asia is the only country I feel safe/secure and where I can be myself! Now personally, I would Leave Thailand and go BACK to central Asia, or East Asia as these places have a very strict work ethic, but certainly none of the other places continents you mentioned In your article.
I like your idea of leaving Thailand every so often. Personally, I would use Thailand as a means to escape winter ONLY, as I am far more interested East Asia and some places in central asia. I think one good strategy here is to use more than one country for a specific need.
For an example. In the West, most of us are nerds, losers, or some sort of social reject. In black America? I am known as the ‘uncle tom or the ‘educated lame’ in because I do not subscribe to the low class degeneracy of the Gansta culture, so because of this I am forever a loser and an outcast, which even includes your own friends and family to exclude you! And since 90% of black Americans are like this, you are subjected to be associated with that crowd by other ethnic groups in America and will be flat out rejected by them. So for someone like me, I definitely see your point in why many guys go from one far end of the extreme to the other side of the extreme. Luckily for me, I like Thailand but I LOVE China and Japan as they have fascinating culture and value systems in which they place education and hard work above all!
So my strategy would be use Japan/China as a means of education or starting a business, use central Asia to go on fantasy journeys and use Thailand as a means to escape winter and for some of the activities that you mentioned In your post.
I guess it is fortunate for me that I do not think I could ever stay in Thailand for more than 6 months simply because my personality trait (INTJ) would not allow me to get toi comfortable in a country of extroverts but it can certainly have it’s purpose!
Alot of things you have mentioned in your post about friends, family etc are somethings I wish I had growing up, but unfortunately I never could make meaningful friends due to the reasons which I’ve stated and I already came from a broken family. So I will be making the best of what I can get while traveling all around asia!
Thanks again for your awesome post!
I’ve not spent enough time in Japan but I could see myself living there, it’s laid back and peaceful but not sure how well one could integrate into society. You should consider Australia, that’s a great place and Melbourne is very diverse from what I hear. The only reason I am not living in Australia right now is its location, so far to go anywhere else.
I pefer to have a base and if you plan to settle down, then a base is better than 2-3 countries for different needs. If you do not plan to settle down then 2-3 countries has more pros.
It’s a shame you don’t have a close connection with your family or childhood friends, I would say that is the most important thing to me, and what keeps be as balanced as I can be.
Well, integration is not really my goal. You will always be a foreigner no matter how much you integrate. But there are far more pros than cons being a foreigner than if you were to some how fully integrate.
Unfortunately, I for one am not looking for diversity and have no interest in being near anyone that looks like me or from the same/similar culture as me as it defeats the purpose. I would had considered Europe but all thanks to the islamification and outrageous immigration that is going on, it would be just another scenario of how life was in america as the immigrants are gonna lump me as some “upity” or “uncle tom” and they are gonna target me and then the local europeans are gonna lump me with those guys. The same is happening in Australia which I want to avoid.
About 70% of American blacks all come from abusive and broken/dysfunctional families, so this is a very common theme with them. It is the reason why we have such an ass backwards culture not to mention it is extremely Gynocentric. Friendships in America are all very cliquish and mostly superficial so even when you try to make friends, it usually never lasts. And in my case it was impossible due to not being able to fit in anywhere. About 90% of my family are criminals, druggies and many of them had died due to crime related death. I have never even met most of them because we always refused to associate with criminals. But hey, life not so bad if you can find other meaningful relationships right? No, I will not ever settle as I have no interest in relationships. So with that said, I would have many bases in my favorite countries if I could.
Most certainly I agree with you that, starting a business, learning a language, working out etc are some things I will mostly be enjoying all over Asia.
A good article, but a little worrying as I plan to come to Thailand at age 35-36. I think everyone’s situation is different and it very much depends what you want out of life and how disciplined you are.
I lived a mostly boring lonely life in the west with few friends and almost zero female interaction. luckily I’ve saved $500k USD which should give me an inflation-adjusted almost $2k a month for the rest of my life. whilst I have many choices the 2 I focus on are staying in the west in a job i hate and an unhappy life just to save more money and then die or go to Thailand and live cheap.
the money would stay in the west and I would never marry. an ideal day would be full of healthy food, exercise, reading, gaming and then women. no drugs little alcohol, just trying to I’ve clean and happy on 2k a month for as long as I can.
worst case I realize its not for me and I go back to the west. does this seem unrealistic or undesirable?
$500k should see you through Thailand nicely if you don’t turn into a degenerate. As you said discipline is key, if you keep your daily focus on yourself and not on girls, your $2k a month will be more than enough, and you’ll have a hell of a time. It’s when you get sucked into the the other stuff is when things start to get tricky.
the girls though are one of the main reasons to go to Thailand. I think you can live in the USA for $2k a month if you don’t spend on BS and really focus on value. ie no brand new car, not living in LA/NYC, not eating out etc.
Doing that, however, one would struggle to get laid and be somewhat of an outcast.
In Thailand I’d want to spend $1600 a month on living and $400 on hookers/dates. I agree its probably best to do it for only 1-3 years, but if I’m still happy and sane at age 40+ then why stop? I think the hardest thing is to be around the bars etc and say no. maybe Chiang Mai is a better and cheaper environment but far less pay4play.
another thing I like the idea of is buying a boat and sailing around the world. lots of videos about it on youtube
The thing is nobody is sane in Thailand after living here for numerous years doing the degen stuff, but many people fool themselves into thinking they are. You really need a 2nd and 3rd opinion from others to assess whether one is doing fine in their 40s. A self-evaluation isn’t worth anything. Ask a crazy person if they think they are crazy.
Anon, you should try to get your skill level in social relationships up before you move to Thailand.
A) Able to get a date and a girlfriend
B) Able to get a new buddy
Thailand is not a good place to grow up as Harvey writes. Try to take some steps at home, otherwise you risk ending up with hookers and deadbeats in Thailand.
Im a bit late to this post…just by 3 years! Im in a similar position too you “anon ofc”. Interested to know if you made the move and how its going….?? I spent 2-3 years in Thailand a few years back teaching….im back in Blighty now and planning on making the move once some of these virus restrictions are lifted….
Harvie is projecting. Just because you’re miserable and wracked by quasi-religious guilt from childhood brainwashing back home doesn’t mean the rest of us are too. Harvie wants guys to volunteer for debt servitude and domestic slavery.
Christ, you got me!
Well, my degen score is 364 after seven years and now 40-years-old. That’s kind of ruined my morning……
Haha.
Great articke. I do not disagree with the article but I think it is a bit simple to imply this on all men. We all have different paths and goals in life. I am happy I never been to Thailand in my twenties because Spain was great in the eighties and nineties, had a ball in my thirties because I got divorced, skipped the forties because I decided to not bring my newlywed wife to a place where cleaners are prettier and having a ball again in my fifties because she gone. Also it depends on what you’re looking for and where you stay. Bkk and Patts is a no go area for me, all the rest is fine. Coyotes and bargirls are great for party nights but they can’t beat the real good Thai girl. Of course my humble opinion.
Seems you have your head screwed on nicely Harm. I was not implying it to all men, just most.
I am interested to know how you can live on 2k per month in BKK. Is it really so inexpensive ?
What would you get for this ??
It depends what you’re doing, if you want to party 3x per week and live in a central location, then you cannot. If you don’t go out and want the simple things in life then $2k is doable in a prime location.
Totally agree. This also pertains to anywhere in the world. I would say partying excessively 3-4x a week over the age of 27 can be disastrous for your physical, sprirtual and mental health.
A good read Harvie, much of what you state is true on the other hand I know people from Western countries who are as screwed up as those you talk about here. I believe it comes down to choices, the path one chooses to take. Many 30 year olds in Thailand and SE Asia are on a career path and building wealth due to low income tax and low cost of living.
You are definitely right about chasing girls and boozing it up but it doesn’t have to be that way, there are lots of activity options particularly in this part of the world ie… scuba diving, game fishing hiking, running the HASH and much more. Millions of people spend tons of money to visit SE Asia and here we are living other people’s dreams while they return to a hum drum over regulated western lifestyle.
The path you speak of is the typical “,I don’t give a shit 20 something year old” and you are right in saying at age 30 a person better straighten up and fly right but then again some people never grow up.
You’re right Bill. I see the same happening with people I know in the UK. It seems nobody wants to grow up, or at least very few people do.
While it’s good to see that you did not succumb to a life of decadence, I think there is a completely other story you have either not discovered or ignore to write about.
Not all of us come to Thailand looking to shag as much as we can take. Thailand can and does offer an educated man an opportunity to meet a wonderful REAL Thai woman and enjoy a long term very fulfilling relationship.
I have seen those poor lost souls you speak of so many times. Looking for a party and cheap sex, but if you look at 99% of Thai society then you will witness that life here is like everywhere. People fall in love. People fight. People break up. People have a long wonderful life and family together.
But a quality individual coming here can find in a woman what is missing in much of the western countries; a woman who takes care of herself as she ages. Not sagging skin, expanding wasteline and hips, and looking 70 when she is 50.
Many guys come here to find someone to take care of them. The whole “finding a traditional woman” thing is about guys who want to control a relationship. They are bound to fail as most of them do. Really who wants a maid for a wife ? Talk about a recipe for disaster.
But back to the point. Yes Thailand can be maddening in terms of visa requirements, limited minority ownership in a company, and property ownership. But it will change as it did in all 1st world countries and many others. Mexico used to have similar property ownership rules but once they changed they saw a boom in investment and wealthy vacation and retirement owners. I would anticipate that Thailand is only 10 years or so from major changes in all of these areas. Otherwise they simply will not be able to compete in an integrated world.
But aside from these issues I find life in Thailand to be much more stimulating than California. Why? Because although I love the natural beauty of the states I detest the mommy state and tree hugging laws that have overwhelmed life there. You can’t breathe. Cost of living is extraordinary. You spend your 30s 40s and 50s chasing as much money as possible and then you wake up and realize you lost your life and soul for the promise of maybe 15-20 years of a decent retirement! That my friend is life in the West.
At least in Thailand I have taken my western work habits which give me a huge advantage over the locals. There is a TON of opportunity to make big money in Thailand. And enjoy a life you most likely would never have in the West.
So instead of saying Leave! Your message should really be Change! In Thailand you can meet a wonderful life mate. A good woman, smart, funny and sexy. Just look in the mirror and decide if you want the brass ring or a box of condoms.
Hey Mike,
Seems you’re one of the 20%< who has their head screwed on. All your points are valid, and yes people should change but many can't because they will relapse. Thailand is a great place to make $$$ and eventually, they will allow outsiders to buy land and property, but I don't see that happening any time soon.
>In Thailand you can meet a wonderful life mate. A good woman, smart, funny and sexy.
I have never seen something resembling a warm and natural relationship between a thai and a western guy as you’d see among best case scenario whites which is also increasingly rare. Thai / western couples always come off as awkward.
They see us as human ATMs or an entry into white society if they’re white worshipers (I only met a rich lao girl that fell into that category, never a thai for some reason and she aspired to live like french royalty in France lol, guess which western guy in Thailand can offer that? nobody…).
The vast majority of successful relationships between Asians and whites are with Chinese women. Filipinas come next however they tend to be dumb as a rock and make up for their lack of intellect with submissiveness and white worshiping as their country is essentially a giant slum.
I am agree with some points of your post. But I’m not with a lot.
You have your point of view and I respect it but is not the only one good.
I lived my 20 s in Europe and saved money and bought properties as you want do at 30 s.
Why is better do that on 20 s than in 30 s?
With my properties and investments I have enough incomes for my life and I do a job as hobby.
I think that you should write this post with 40 years. Can’t talk about 30 s without live it. In 20 s years you have a point of view and with 30 s will be different but that depence of each one. You can have some experience in your life and change your point of view completely.
If you pass a hard sickness maybe the money and properties have less value for you… Is just an example.
Anyway congrats for your great post. : )
Good insights Peq, food for thought.
What a load of codswallop. I come here for a break 7 years ago after a six week failed marriage to a young German bitch. I had a couple of nights with a couple of bar girls, one is still a friend. She is, actually related to my wife and at my wedding three weeks ago. I wasn’t interested in hooking up with a bar girl, I’m friends with heaps of whores back home and I mean friends, not a client. I treat them with respect and are respected back for it. Mtmy new wife lives with me in my country where she now has residency after 4 years and we spend half the year there and half the year here. I’m 60 and she is 40. We are both living a great life neither us would have had if I didn’t come to Thailand. You can’t put us all in your little box thinking we are some sick dude like you. We party hard here and live a quiet life with a daily visit to our local bar followed by some quality time each evening at home. I’m enjoying life at 60 more than if I was a single lonely bastard back home. I’ve another mate just turned 65 and he has his long-term 27yo gf back home and they are very happy and I don’t see that changing. We are not all arseholes and Thai girls soon work that out. Anyone having problems with girls here needs to look at themselves first.
Thailand is a great place for people over 55+, it’s cheap, your pension goes far and you have a visa, not so much if you’re 30.
Is the article foreshadowing your departure from Thailand?
I don’t think I’ll be going just yet. I’ll wrote the article as more of a warning to the younger guys, I heeded my warning and now want to see if one can live in Bangkok and avoid all that, but a part of me does think about moving in the next 1-5 years.
Bankong is becoming very overpriced for a 3rd world city (you have to look very hard for good rental deals) and increasingly hostile to western people as thais are apparently tired of the tourist floods (record breaking numbers come every year).
I moved to Thailand first in 2008 for a year when I had a reasonably good time and came back in 2016. I like nice restaurants and nice apartments and I lived in Thong Lo where thais treated me like an evil invader wherever I went in the area.
There were also quite a few thai feminists – the fallout of western education and western guys pumping and dumping.
Go to a hiso hangout like Casa Lapin on Sukhumvit 26 and servers will barely acknowledge your existence and baristas will tell you to pick up your own coffee in a condescending manner.
https://www.facebook.com/CasaLapin/ (strictly negative reviews from foreigners)
They are paid pretty much nothing too, I think that has more to do with it then us being outsiders. Lol’d at reviews.
>I’m friends with heaps of whores back home and I mean friends, not a client. I treat them with respect and are respected back for it.
Idk where you’re from but western whores tend to be the most hardened women cause they’re banged by the weakest betas all day. They only respect strength (as in pimps willing to beat them to pulp if they step out of line) and see everybody else as a human ATM.
Interesting article. Your perspective is enlightening to say the least. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
You should have added a blackpill trigger warning Harvey.
Actually unfortunately you described me pretty well. I did all the stuff you write about in my twenties, then went back home at 28, crashed at a friends, who helped me get back in the game, found a job (digital marketing) within a month, then went on to have 3 memorable years with career advancement and got into some relationships.
Already here I was a stupid fucker. I should have stayed in those relationships and not gone for chasing girls, but I was in part Thailand mode, part “catching up” mode, since now on the back of Thailand confidence and my age/experience, having sloot attention more than ever before.
I also got offered my boss’ job, but I declined it, because I wanted to be self employed and maybe one day move back to Thailand, which I did. Again, stupid fucker.
That was a really stupid idea. I’ll spare you off the details, but it’s pretty much what you describe. Now when I got back home, this time there was no friend couch to crash on or a job to find, cause I got a health condition instead.
Let’s not act as if going back to Europe is the cure for all ailments though. I suggest you bring lots of cash when moving back home, cause you definitely don’t want to end up competing with the bugmen for a starting end job. I got offered a job in London (I’m not a brit) and when I saw the working environment, I was like nope nope nope and did a 360 and walked away.
I’m not sure how old you are, but if you’re late twenties and with some money, I’d recommend you to go back now. Your value as a man is at an absolute peak and if you play your cards well, you can snatch a nice (younger) girl and get into a good career job (I advice digital marketing), while being seen as “exciting talent”. The minute you turn 30 is the time you go from “talent” to “bust”, so make do with what you got now.
Great post Eric, that will be very useful to some of my readers. Money is key at 30, without it you’re going to have a bad time.
Happy birthday, Pimp Harvie
This was written by a loser for losers. Quit lumping every foreign guy into the sad/sex desperate/childish group. This article tries hard to sound wise and inclusive, however it just makes the author sound pathetic.
I agree, running this website by default makes the author and anyone reading a loser. Welcome to the club.
What kind of winner (as in trust fund kid or alpha chad bro) ends up in Thailand, a 3rd world country, anyway? Keep on deluding yourself…
You been in your twenties too once, its normal for guys that age to see misery in every other persons life and to find flaws in other peoples activities. Dont you remember how you thought your relationships and lovelife was better and purer than everyone elses? They love to talk about how they imagine older guys with young girlfriends are “not really happy” and they see a lot of things that they want to see. With these normal human traits in mind the article isnt outrageous, its subdued if anything.
>I would estimate that at least 70%+ of men who have lived in Thailand longer than 3 years and are in their 30s have mental issues
I find your assertion to be correct, but it’s not because of the availability of whores and degenerate activities, which is on equal level in most parts of Europe (especially Berlin comes to my mind) but because thais are inherently different than whites thus completely unrelateable. Thai society is incomprehensible to whites and you’ll never be a part of it. You’ll always be that weird alien being – the FARANG!
Next thing you know you go full Colonell Kurtz due to the social isolation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNRBajLM8_4
Those who aren’t loners that find other foreigners way sketchier than yourself find fellow degenerates that center their lifes around the lowest common determinators of banging hookers and drinking alcohol all day while rambling on about soccer or other lowest common determinator topics.
Lets not forget that places where you commonly hang out with other foreigners that actually live there and want to make buddies with other foreigners at an older age is pretty much just Pattaya which is full of dodgy scumbags.
Most guys get suicidally depressed, drink themselves to death, become ladyboys at old age or w/e. Primitive 3rd world countries tend to break lone white men mentally sooner or later.
Even though my life isn’t good in the west at least I can relate to people.
Good points. I belive the less close you’re to friends and family in your native country, the more likely you’re to become a degen.
To further add to my points: Does anyone really identify with anyone in Thailand?
There are virtually no white collar workers. Most guys are dodgy hustlers doing ??? all day while wearing flip flops shorts and the cheapest t-shirt, amulets and getting unhygienic street food from tuberculosis carrying fellow peasants on a plastic chair, after which they drink some whiskey and whore around.
Their way of living is very alien to western people who organize, systematize and value sophistication and desire to live in a relatively equal opportunity society.
Morals and values are complete opposite.
Lets not forget that I constantly get angry looks and stares for simply existing. In the western world, I would have to seriously do something bad to piss off people like that.
What do you wear to get looks? I almost never get looks.
I mainly wear smart casual Zara stuff like this:
I removed the link, that is odd unless you’re staring at people and don’t know it or have a certain swagger.
I wouldn’t worry so much about being “stared” at Reader.
If you are one of the “undesirable” races (black, arab , indian) you will be be either blatantly (asia) or behind your back (US,Canada) stared and snickered at.
If you start making a lot of money, people will hate you and stare even more (jealousy).
If you date an extremely attractive light skinned tall asian girl, they will give you looks like WTF. It will happen both from thais/asians and people of your own race, which is hilarious.
I’ve lived all over the world and currently live in probably the least racist country in the world (Canada), and people still give me weird looks in asian neighbourhoods in this country, like WTF am I doing there, and why do I have an attractive asian girl with me?
I have never experienced any of that, not in Bangkok anyway.
Sorry, but this can be said to any country of the world ! If your a pervert and only want to pay for sex, cheat lie and be a drunk, then stay at home alone !! I have lived in Europe, Thailand and Australia.. if I was just a perv then nowhere is good !!!
20 year olds don’t come here as perverts, they are turned into perverts by being exposed to the wrong stuff for too long.
Honestly, I stumbled upon your website when I was vacationing in Phuket last year. Obviously, the SEO search was messed up because I wasn’t exactly ugh…interested to learn how to pick up a Thai girlfriend.
Even though I was mostly disgusted with the website, I did note some ingenuity and wit in the expression of distasteful ideas (my own opinion, I understand it must be a thrill/highly useful for some). Largely, this is a great website for your audience.
Inherently, there’s nothing wrong with going around having sex and paying for sex but there’s something wrong if you are letting it control you and determine your identity/existence. I realized that you were most likely suffering some sort of existential crisis to keep seeking sexual pleasures like a mouse trapped in a cage pressing the dopamine button for dear life.
Why do foreigners come to these developing countries to feel like kings? The real truth is that the world is based on the survival of the fittest. The competition is hard in first world countries to gain some resemblance of success like a girl, a job, or a house. Being in a developing country seems to mask this very basic fact of societies. People want to escape from the truth. It gives them the illusion of power. And what I like about this article is that you’re realizing that this “power” doesn’t really amount to anything. The truth is you’re not really wealthy and successful just because the exchange rate just happens to benefit you.
Overall, this is a really well-written article. You can surely find success and happiness. Honestly, like I think expats can do a lot with their time in Thailand to achieve happiness in the long run after (or during – whatever floats your boat) the period of banging or wtv. Sure, bang whoever is walking on the weekends but there’s more you can do. You go on about banging Thai girlfriends why don’t you ask them to teach you some Thai so that you become fluent in order to be a translator or wtv. Or invent an app for the developing markets. It’s honestly just about the mindset.
If you (writer of this website) can figure out the key to bang girls without paying them, you should use the same energy to figure out a way to find happiness and success. You’re too damn intelligent to be feeling sad or whatever.
Perfect comment, can’t really argue with any of that, agree with most things.
“An app to help the third world”
Lol
We had a thing called colonialism, which did that.
The west literally lifted primitive feudal societies, many of them not even bronze age, into the modern world within 50-100 years.
It’s probably the knowledge of this fact, that elevates the status of westerners in these countries. Without western man, there would be no car, no cell phone, no hospitals, no tv, no music, no instagram.
Get it?
There would also be less pollution, modern-day slavery and destruction of nature and earth too (just playing Devil’s Advocate).
I’m not a fan of the West, don’t get me wrong, but people fail to realize that the countries “we” liberated where by and large autocratic violent feudal societies rife with – ironically – slavery and forced labor.
I take back the snark in the comment, but I can’t stand this false idea that colonialism brought these problems (such as slavery).
Some excellent points in this post but what you said can also be said about living “successfully” in the west. Am I really successful living in a 1M+ condo, with a fancy italian car , and a gold diggin girlfriend or am I just taking advantage of easy credit (2-4% APR LOL), and low cost luxury goods in a western country?
Sure we all know the vast majority of men who come to thailand just couldn’t cut it back home and are “losers”, but is that necessarily bad? People live like robots here, and if you go to a place like japan its sad robots with no relationships or kids, eating alone on an island that is being flooded with radiation.
The second half of your point holds very true. Find your own success and hapiness, and find it from within, not external validation like banging the hottest girl or the nicest property/car etc. You do this and everything else will fall into place.
This is a really good post but to be honest can be applied anywhere. I had a lot of success in my business in my early 30s which allowed me to live the degen life in the western world, no questions asked or judgment (just replace thai girls with kgirls who are much more intelligent, and alcohol with weed, which is legal here).
I think Thailand should be used as a “pit stop” for any male bred in fuked up societies like the west where being a man is a crime. Clearly its not a place to start a family and I would never reco holding your investments there. However, it does allow men to “grow” for short period of time and only Asian countries now have male-dominant cultures without being sexually repressed like those shit Arab states.
After you’re there a few years try a more civil place like Singapore or another continent.
Yes, agree.
>After you’re there a few years try a more civil place like Singapore
Bad idea, Singapore has the craziest women that are hellbent on emasculating men.
They’ll openly insult you and get you locked up if you dare to fight back.
If you think the prison isle aka UK is bad, think again…
Thanks for the heads up on singapore reader. Personally I would never live there due to authoritarian govt and its a more boring/expensive/polluted version of the west.
However, their tax rates are favourible, and banking some of the most stable in the world, which is something to consider for the more successful readers.
Singapore is a better place to raise a child, start a family or make a big business, things people will consider in their 30s. It just has a high barrier of entry $$$.
Hong Kong strikes me as the best place to raise a multicultural child in Asia.
It has first world amenities, natural beauty (beaches, parks, hills), but more important, it has a culture where you can grow and live, also as a mixed race child.
Hong Kong is graduating from BKK, if you want to keep being an Asian expat. And for what it is worth, it also still has some excellent nightlife and degen in small dose if that’s what you want. Remember that Hong Kong used to be a crazy place before it was cleaned up. Look up “Kowloon walled city”!
It’s expensive, but not prohibitively.
HK is definitely a very cosmopolitan city, and one of the better locations to raise a biracial child in Asia. The other one I think would be good would be malaysia.
People in HK are assholes tho (just like NYC), and its pretty polluted like the rest of asia.
As for cost living, last time I checked it was still even more expensive than London/NYC in terms of real estate (1M for a 400 sqft condo LOL).
While this is a fantastic post by the author, a few things came out at me when reading it again.
I wouldn’t worry so much about trying to get into a serious relationship in your 30s and plan everything out, if it happens it happens. The author is using typical female psychology thinking they need X years with X partner and a buffer in case “things dont work out”.
Get that shit out your head bruv. You may think you can’t get an intelligent 20-30 something when your 40s but you’re wrong. There are many 40 year guys who look 28 LOL, only now they are successful with money (ex. Jared Leto). It takes meticulous care with your body and diet, and avoiding smoking/alcohol and getting good sleep.
Also asian girls in their 30s take shockingly good care of themselves and manage to look like they are late 20s a good decade or more. Added benefit is the 30s girls really know how to f*** and are easier to have an intelligent conv with even if english isnt their first language.
Point is if the author is not asian he was never getting the actual “cream of the crop” lets be real, but odds are you wouldn’t want those girls coming from the west as they are just class whores, so don’t worry so much about time, it works against women but works for us.
There are a shocking amount of intelligent korean and japanese women in their 30s great shape, look younger, but not the right class or too dark, or wrong family, and these girls can make great wives to pop out a few kids and become a real life partner in a 3rd country (outside their racist home countries lol)
No expat who moves to Thailand is cream of the crop, we are mostly bottom feeders.
Harvie – I’ve followed your story since the beginning. Congrats on growing out of Thailand. Now be strong, and get the hell out of there.
Time to graduate to real life. A lasting relationship, a family. Chase respect from your peers, not from desperate hookers and degenerates.
It’s hard to shake completely, hence why I’m still looking back. Of course you’ll miss some aspects, but the risk is missing something far more valuable in the First World.
Your window is closing; soon it will be impossible to explain to any Interviewer, or any decent girls just what you were doing in Thailand all those years without sounding like a complete cunt.
The thing that keeps you warm at night isn’t a Wife. It’s self-respect.
Take the skills and confidence you’ve learnt, and go build a future.
Well played, Sir.
P.s Invest in FCT. Factom.
Thanks Robbo, all good advice. #Hold.
What is this perceived window, I don’t get it. My self-respect lies in working on things I believe to be meaningful to me, not based on societies notion of arbitrary milestones.
Some guys are lucky enough to deceive other guys and make money as a pick up artist.
There are guys who sell some digital products to make money as well.
They can date tons of girls in 30s,40s,… as long as they make money through that way.
I also live in Bangkok and agree that Thailand is best for men in their 20’s and later in life after they have their nest egg and/or pension. However, if you have a way of earning enough money for a solid middle class lifestyle plus save for retirement then you might want to consider staying here because the West is increasingly hostile to masculine, non submissive men. Living in a society that caters to men is so much for gratifying than living in one that caters to the whims of women at the expense of men.
In your 30s, you should not only make sure your financial house is in order but you look at having a family. I wouldn’t rule Thailand out for that either. Like the West, Thailand is a mixed bag for men. I know men here of 30+who have healthy marriages. Often they lived here for at least 5 years before meeting an educated middle class woman they wanted as a wife who didn’t just view them as an atm on 2 legs. Your Thai lady is also likely not going to get fat, a trait that is rapidly disappearing in the West. Plus you won’t be divorced raped in Thailand. On the other hand, Thailand does lead the planet in infidelity (and traffic deaths!) so you have to watch out. You will also always be an outsider and never considered a Thai or have equal legal rights.
I am in 60s so life it’s more comfortable and fun here than if I was back in the states. I have lived in 5 other countries outside of the U.S. and Thailand fits me best.
A balanced comment and one I agree with.
H, like what you’re doing here…I actually married the office girl who helped pull me out of gutter. Raised two boys in US, now retiring to beach in south. Having practically lived on patpong and nana for years many of your questions resonate. My perspectives differ on many things from the country I went back to–but to their deficit me thinks. Find a passion that helps bring up others..gives you a purpose bigger than your little head…it’s what saves you…for me two sons…now helping education here. Read. Be well.
Здравствуйте,
Thanks for this article. I am very a succesful online entrepeneur that spends in Thailand 6 months per year. Been like that for 5 years. I keep my mental sanity because I have always loved the healthy life and the hustling. However temptations in Bkk are always strong and they always lead me to degenerate behaviours. That is why I always go to Chiang Mai : More of a balanced place, doing yoga helps with sex addiction, and you can be part of a community there as well.