The Black and Indian Guide to Dating Thai Girls

What’s it like for Black and Indians in Thailand, and do Thai girls like us, have been the most emailed questions to me in 2018.

Disclaimer: the rest of this article is going to be intentionally offensive, uncomfortably racist and triggering all in the name of dark humor. Please leave now if you’re offended easily.

Literally, my inbox has been bombarded with questions like this from brothers all over the world asking me:

  • if Thai girls dislike you
  • if Thai girls like tanned skin
  • if Thai girls will like me because I’m an Indian born in Australia or a black guy from the United States
  • if Thai girls like Arabs
  • if everything they read online about blacks and Indians being the scum of Thailand is true?

If you’re black, Indian or any skin tone that is not white or yellow, I’m going just going to tell you the truth through my eyes.

I’m going to break down everything a black or Indian guy needs to know when interacting with Thai girls or coming to Thailand, because the rules of the game are different for you.

This might also be a good time to tell you that I am not white, white people aren’t this funny.

Are Thai Girls Racist?

Are all Thai girls racist? No.

Are some Thai girls racist? Of course, Asia is probably the most racist continent in the world.

And by some, I mean a very small percentage, based on my 6 years of living here I would say the percentage is in single digits. I live in Bangkok which is a very modern city, if you choose to live in other areas of Thailand, I can see that number rising as big cities embrace change.

Are most Thai girls friendly? Yes, they are wonderful and warm.

Are some Thai girls not racist but they don’t find Indian or black men attractive? Yes, this is very common.

Will some Thai girls treat you with caution or give you a funny look because you have dark skin? Yes, some will if you give them the wrong impression (I’ll talk about this later).

In a nutshell, Thai girls are not racist but many don’t find tanned guys attractive, and they apply common stereotypes based on your skin color.

Can black and Indians guys date Thai girls?

Yes you can, but it’s a little harder.

Being a brother in the good ole USA means you gotta work 30% harder than the white man to get the same privileges.

Those rules apply here too.

Why would you think they wouldn’t?

Why is it harder for Indians and blacks to date Thai girls?

It just so happens that on the Asia continent, Indian and blacks are not considered attractive.

I’m sorry. I didn’t make these rules. I am merely the messenger.

In Asia, white skin is a sign of beauty and wealth. If you have tan skin it means you work outside in the heat and therefore must be poor.

This means that before a Thai girl would want to date you, they’ll consider better options such as:

  • Thai guys
  • Asian/western-Asian guys

If they fail here, they will go into second, slightly murkier pool:

  • White people

If they dip their hands in twice and fail, and also failed to commit suicide, they’ll look at the bottom of the barrel:

  • Black people
  • Indian people

I did warn you this was going to be uncomfortably racist. 

That is a very broad generalization but in a vacuum this is true. Sure you can find exceptions, but they are just that.

A Thai girl will date a white guy only because she is unable to get good Thai/Asian guys.

Or because she married or dated an Asian guy who treated her like shit. Some find it hard to find better Asian guys because of their social status in Thailand, so prefer to date westerns who aren’t bothered about that.

Nowadays you’ll even hear crazy white folk say things like “I won’t date girls who are not white skin”  or “I won’t date a girl who comes from Isan” because they are silly enough to buy into social classes in Asia.

Stop being friends with these people.

Yes some Thai girls love tan skin, it’s a small but growing percentage.

Essentially you’re at the bottom of their attractive list, just like a short fat girl with acne on her face is at the bottom of yours.

No point getting angry about it, that won’t help.

The good news is you can change their perception quite easily using these 3 tips.

1. Stop looking so black or Indian

The first step is to admit that being black and Indian is not okay and that you need to make a change.

If you’re dressing like a typical black person, stop it.

Indians shave your beard twice a day because Asia hates facial hair. They think it’s unclean. Always be clean shaven.

Always wear trousers and a t-shirt minimum. Always. I don’t care if its 50 degrees, always dress nice. You have to do it. The only time you can wear shorts is when your feet are touching sand.

Get rid of everything that makes you look black or Indian.

An easy way to do this is to start shopping at H&M, Zara, Topman and other places white people go.

You need to dress like the white man because they are non-threatening.

With your new clothes, you can blend in and Thai girls will be more than happy to talk to you or give you their number.

But if you portray all the typical stereotypes of a black or Indian man in how you dress and look:

2. Don’t be in big colored groups

A group of 5 Indian or black men is not a good look anywhere but a prison cell.

Dilute, not pollute – that is your new mantra.

A table of 5 black men in a nightclub is going to scare Thai girls, hell I’m scared just thinking about it.

Thai girls won’t want to come near your table because let’s be honest, you all look fucking scary and intimidating.

Nobody wants to mess with you, and that’s exactly why we get rejected at bars and clubs in the west.

But if you remove 4 of your black panthers for white people, the table you’re on becomes diluted, friendlier and easier to approach.

If you talk to a girl and ask her to come to your table, because there are so many non-threatening white people, she will be fine and happy to get to know you more.

If you do pick up, you’ll have 10x more success talking to girls if your group is mostly white. If you’re dynamic enough you can even put yourself in a place of higher value to Thai girls than anyone else in your group, I’ll save that info for the ebook.

Coming here on a holiday with colored brothers makes it very hard (but not impossible) to pick up normal Thai girls just because a group of indians and blacks is scary.

Don’t shoot the messenger!

If you’re coming here alone, it will pay huge dividends to find a white male friend when going out at night.

My advice for black and Indian solo travelers is to pick up a white guy before you try and pick up a Thai girl.

3. Take it real slow

Countless times I’ve seen Indians go up to a Thai girl and start dancing with her, this is after she has told him to fuck off.

The feedback I’ve gotten off people is that Indians have no respect for girls and this is seen in how they never tip, always ask for cheaper rates and overall treat everyone like shit.

Again, please don’t shoot the messenger.

So for this reason, you need to be very passive when talking to girls, the bad Indians have ruined it for the good ones.

Don’t touch them when dancing, don’t ask for their number or tell them they look great.

Talk about stuff that makes you look non-threatening, hobbies, travel, work and other boring stuff. Never advance the conversation forward until you get at least 3 body language signals that she likes you.

That is important, she needs to give you a clear sign that she likes you.

Black guys you can be a little more aggressive but still keep it slow.

Keep in mind this is what people think of you here: Big. Black. Scary. Strong. Muscely. Dirty. Big dicks.

Don’t shoot the messenger!

Thai girls are quite small in bone size compared to the west, and they think you all have big dicks and will kill them (really, they do).

Keep it slow and friendly.

Be passive aggressive and you’ll have a much better time at getting girls.

But what if I’m western and Indian or black?

If you’re western it does help a lot.

It helps even more if you don’t have the same features or body traits as your ancestors.

But it still doesn’t get you to where you need to be.

Even if you have a US passport and have spent your entire life in the US, have an American accent and dress like a white man, you’ll still need to show to Thai girls you’re not like the bad guys.

The 3 tips above are to de-blackalize/indianaize you.

Chris Rock had a funny joke about black people and niggers, you need to show Thai girls you’re a black person and not a nigger (please watch):

This joke was performed in 1996 – 20+ years ago. While the West treats black people more or less as equals, Asia holds on to a lot of stereotypes mentioned in the video above.

My advice will allow you to introduce yourself physically and verbally as: Hey I’m not a nigger, I’m just a normal black guy.

If you show them this, girls will be like: Oh holy shit, I never knew blacks were like this, you people are so freaking cool. Can I learn more about you?

You must educate Thai girls and get them to breakaway from their ignorant ideas that dark is not sexy or that all Indians are rude and abusive, and into the oh man I was so ignorant, most Indians and blacks are cool, and I had it all wrong.

Once you do that, you can go back to wearing your bandana and basketball shorts and growing your facial hair.

The introduction phase is where most colored people fall. Once you can get Thai girls to see past typical stereotypes, you’re golden.

My experience of racism in Thailand

Look, I’ve been in Thailand for 6 years and I’ve had very little racism thrown at me.

Lifetime I’ve been rejected to a total of 3 bars because all my crew was dark. I wasn’t even mad, because if I owned that bar I would not have let my friends in either, we looked scary!

Once a landlord asked me something racist as I was about to move in, I called her out saying that’s not a very nice thing to say and how would she like it if she came to the UK and I said the same thing to her.

She called me back the next day apologizing saying she did not mean it in a racist way, but that Thai people have stereotypes in their mind and she was wrong to say it. She told me she would really love for me to reconsider taking her room. I thought this was very big of her (I did not take the room in the end).

Other than that it’s been fine, never been close to getting in a fight or anything like that.

But I’m a light shade of tan. And I’m tall. And I’m jacked. And I’m handsome. And I squat. And I know how to play the game.

I’ve read many stories of brown and black guys being treated unfairly in Thailand, I wonder how many of them failed to use the 3 tips above or even bothered to learn Thai culture before coming here.

Being smartly dressed and clean shaven at all times is a FUCKING BIG DEAL IF YOU’RE NOT WHITE. Go to the beach and you’ll see very few Thai people in bikinis, instead, they are wearing t-shirts going into the water.

Thailand has a very conservative culture, if you fail to understand this then yes people are going to look at you funny. That’s just how it is!

If you’re showing off lots of skin on the BTS or have a rugged beard, people are going to look at you funny.

Thailand is a funny old place, if you learn to play the game, it doesn’t matter if you’re white, brown, black or blue- you’ll have a hell of a time and everyone will smile back at you.

I’m not white and my women hairdresser always calls me handsome in Thai, and when I go get a normal massage, women often comment on how tall or handsome I am.

They say it because I do look good, but more importantly, because I’m being super friendly towards them and make small talk in broken-Thai and English.

I always give out a positive energy, I smile, my body language is open, I show them I’m a non-threating and they embrace me.

You have to do the same.

If you’re going to sulk or throw your toys out the pram because someone looks at you funny, the energy you output will be negative, you’ll look mean and that will compound into more people looking at you weird.

I do believe the blacker you’re, the harder the game is.

So while I’ve been playing on medium mode, if you’re full black you’re going to have a tougher time.

Having said that, I’ve had black black friends visit me in Bangkok and the closest thing to racism they got was a girl telling him “I love chocolate man” which I think is a compliment. But he dressed well and understood the culture.

This is just my experience, and I’m sure people in the comments are going to tell you something different.

The fact remains that anyone can have an amazing time in Thailand regardless of the color of their skin if they learn the culture and game.

Have a question?

If you’re Indian or Black you can fit in here just fine if you understand Thai people.

Thailand welcomes everyone, just be respectful dress accordingly and follow my tips above.

What are your thoughts?

Disclaimer: if you found any of this racist, I am joking.

If you're thinking about moving to Thailand and need help or advice, check out my Online Nomad Group by clicking here.
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