What are Indonesian Women Really Like?
Indonesian women are some of the most beautiful I have ever seen.
This article is a guest post written by G Freedom.
If you want to meet sexy Indonesian women for free, then check out this article.
Unlike other nations in South East Asia, there is great genetic diversity in Indonesia. The people are a mix of Malay, Chinese, Indian, Arabic, Dutch, Japanese and Polynesian. Evey shape, size, skin tone and type of sexy you can think of is to be found here.
You’ll also find every kind of personality type here from good little church girls to sex mad women with an obsession with Western men and money.
It’s pretty hard to generalise when talking about this many people, but there are still some things that most Indonesian girls have in common. That’s what I plan to talk about in this article.
Who am I to teach you about Indonesia women?
I moved here when I was 22 and have been here now for close to eight years. During that time I have been with lots of Indonesian women and dated two long term.
I also know many more on a non romantic level. The same traits can be found throughout.
Common Traits Indonesian Women Share
The Desire For Manly Men
Indonesian women are very different from Western women. They will not play bull-shit power games with you or try to take over the power in the relationship. They look for stronger, more dominant men who are going to take charge. Make decisions and lead them. Feminism and other mental brain orders have not come down into the culture, and women very much still go for the beefy muscle guy.
I once wrote a poem for an Indonesian woman and she called me a pussy and broke thing off with me. That’s a perfect example of what I’m talking about. Indonesian women will not be comfortable in a position of leader ship or control over a man. You need to be firm and in charge if you want her to stick around. She’ll respect you for it.
Related: Learn how to use Tinder in Indonesia.
Do be aware that this means you will pay for everything, all the time. It’s just the way things are done here and I have no problem with it.
Keep a close eye on appearance
Beauty and looks play a huge role in Indonesian culture. You could argue they do anywhere, but it is much more intense here.
As a result Indonesian women pay a lot of attention to how they look. Salons are everywhere. Skin treatments, fake nails, makeup, designer clothes and all manner of cosmetics are booming industries here. The result is a population of women who are very feminine, pretty and know how to take care of themselves.
This also means Indonesian women will place their entire value as human beings on how they look.
This is great for a piece of arm candy in the mall, but can get frustrating when you want to do outdoor stuff like diving and surfing. Most girls I have met will take a pass if it ends up running their make up.
Note that this is not always true outside of big cities where a more traditional breed of woman can be found. I can only speak from my experience which is dealing with women from Jakarta, Bandung and Bali.
Religion
If you plan to get serious and commit to her (believe me, you only think you’re immune to this idea). You need to understand that religion plays a massive role in an Indonesian woman’s life.
She may not actually be a that religious, but traditions and her parents approval of you is a big part to the success of your relationship. Indonesia is the largest Muslim nation on earth, so most of the women you meet here will be of that faith.
If you aren’t willing to convert in order to lock it down you can forget about it. Not only will she leave you, it is against the law for her to marry you unless you are also a Muslim.
Don’t worry though, you won’t have to learn Arabic or anything like that. $50 and a quick visit to the temple they will convert you to good Muslim anywhere in Java. You’ll just have to take one for the team, an it will likely be worth it in the long run!
The Love of Fun
I have never met an Indonesian woman who does not love to have fun. Despite being seen as somewhat more traditional and perhaps even religious, this is all a lie.
Underneath you will find the majority love to party, travel, have wild and passionate sex. For many of the women who are dating a Western man for the first time, she will be enthralled by the devil-may-care.
Fuck it let’s see what happens attitude you bring to the table.
If you want to meet sexy Indonesian Girls for free, then check out this article.
Indonesian women are a lot of fun to date. They combine a traditional, wifely, motherly role with a wild side I have never encountered anywhere else to date.A great balance!
You’ll also rarely hear them complain or say negative shit. They just kind of shrug and accept that sometimes life deals you a bum card. Indonesian women just smile and get on with it.
Bule Mania
No, that’s not a typo. I said “Bule” which is the Indonesian word for Western man.
If you are from the West, and particularly if you are milky white (not being racist, just telling you the facts). You are going to have an endless parade of interested, sexy Indonesian women sitting on your knee during your time here.
Unlike Thailand and other tourist destinations, Indonesia is still somewhat off the map and the ratio of tourists per local. WAY lower than any other place in South East Asia.
You can find plenty of girls in clubs or on dating sites. If you are coming here in a few weeks, setting up a few online dates before you come is easy and almost certain to get you laid.
That means as a Westerner you are going to get a lot of attention from Indonesian women. It’s the good old law of supply and demand at work as always, this time working in your favour!
I’ve had women in bars walk up and put their number in my pocket. This was while I was clearly standing there having a chat with my girlfriend. This is a good example of the dating scene in Jakarta.
Update: this article was updated in Jan 2019 for below.
30,000 or 70,000 depending who you ask. Nice tropical islands with hot volcanoes, unspoiled tropical reef and staggered rice paddies climbing into the clouds.
And some of the hottest Indonesian girls on the planet.
I first arrived in Indonesia in 2007 planning to spend a year here teaching English and writing a novel. Here I am 7 years later, the book still isn’t done but there have been many epic adventures since with plenty of Indonesian girls along the way.
Oh and lots and lots of fun hookups with stunningly beautiful Indonesian women.
Indonesian girls have it all – looks, charm and a fun-loving attitude. They have the unrivaled ability to make you fall for them, dreaming of spending your life savings to build a house in a rice paddy in central Java.
Just so you can keep receiving all the benefits that come from having an Indonesian woman in your life.
So after 7 years of this I’ve decided to write a guide to Indonesian girls. How to meet them, how to charm them and if/when to make them your girl or girlfriend.
Welcome to 150 million Indonesian women. 50 million of whom are gorgeous and 49.99 million of whom will be keen to meet up, chat, and maybe even hook up with an expat.
A Word of Caution
Before you come to Indonesia with pockets full of dollars and a suitcase of condoms. You should be aware that sex before marriage is technically illegal in this country.
It happens A LOT. But you should make an effort to keep things under wraps if you do meet a special little Indonesian lady you want to shack up with. Which also happens A LOT. You should know the law and have the appropriate papers.
Indonesia is a Muslim nation. While it is 100% safe and very liberal there are always kill joys on a power trip who what to make the Western infidel pay. You definitely do not want to be doing any form of public shagging, beach groping or french kissing. Just show respect and you will be fine.
Enough of the boring legal stuff. Indonesia is arguably one of the most under rated destinations on the planet. Living here for seven years I’ve never had so much fun. It is, under the surface, a very, very naughty place.
Where to Meet Indonesian Girls
The first place I would suggest meeting Indonesian girls is on dating sites. Indonesian Cupid seems to be the most popular with tons of hot Indonesian girls who will be more than happy to meet. You would be best off pipe lining dates a few weeks before you arrive so you can get going as soon as you land.
There are very few ladyboys on these sites so don’t worry about that.
Be warned that like all Asian dating sites, there are a small percentage of hookers.
They will be easy to spot usually. You can block them and focus your time on normal Indonesian girls.
You can read my guide on Bali hookers and hookers in Jakarta for more info.
Outside of online
What you will notice as soon as you set foot in Indonesia is that there are young, attractive Indonesian women absolutely everywhere.
Indonesia has a very young population with 300 million people. If you are coming from a nation that isn’t so populated you can feel like you have been handed the key to another realm. Where pretty Indonesian girls in droves are walking around and lots of them are paying attention to you openly and overtly.
Unlike Thailand, Cambodia and other destinations in Asia. outside of Bali Westerners are still a rarity here. Indonesia is a huge country and doesn’t get anywhere near the amount of travelers as other more popular places do. Since most backpackers are too broke to buy a flight and the visa is limited to 30 days.
If you do plan to visit Bali then read my nightlife guide on Bali and the best red light district areas.
This of course works to the magical advantage of those who do have the money. If you are willing to spend and are willing to come to this great country – you enjoy its delights.
Meeting Indonesian women isn’t hard at all because they are everywhere. At all times and I can personally guarantee you they are some of the friendliest, most approachable women in the world.
Nobody will blow you off or make you feel bad for starting a conversation. Often they will attempt to start the conversation with you. Even if it goes no further than that there will never be any rudeness or ice-queen blow offs. Unless you are a lecherous drunk and come on too strong.
In Jakarta and Bali there are endless bars, nightclubs and coffee shops where you could easily offer to buy an Indonesian girl a drink. (The universal signal for “I want to have sex with you, are you interested?”).
If you want to go directly to a sex spa, read my guide on the 7 top sex spas in Jakarta.
Malls with truck loads of single Indonesian ladies dressed to the nines. Some are hoping you have the actual balls to walk up and ask them on a date.
Good night clubs in Jakarta are X2, Red Square or Blowfish. For good expat friendly bars and live music check out Eastern Promise or Star Deli.
If you want to meet freelancers then Blok M is your first choice.
So now you know where to meet the ladies, what should you be expecting?
Cultural Dating Norms
There are plenty of young, free women in Indonesia who are into casually hooking up and expect no boy friend what so ever. They’re what’s known locally as “ayam” (chickens). You’ll find them in every club, bar and 5 star hotel known to be frequented by expats.
They aren’t hookers looking for a payday, but more likely are just out to have no strings attached fun. Keep in mind they will want you to pay for drinks and a taxi home.
If f you do start seeing a woman often there are two things you need to be aware of. It is said that if an Indonesian woman goes on a third date with you, she has already decided you are fit to be a husband in the future.
It’s possibly exaggerated but you need to be aware that things move a lot faster here than in Western countries.By date 4 or 5 you are in solid relationship territory.
Meeting the parents and family is an absolutely clear signal that you intend to get married. Do not do this unless you are serious with her. Indonesian families do not approve of nor want their daughters bringing back multiple boyfriends to the house. If your Indonesian girl invites you over, think twice before accepting.
There is a cultural game going on here that most do not know about.
If you do happen to find a “nice girl” who has never met a Western man before and is from rural Indonesia, play nice. If you deflower her and aren’t interested in anything long-term you are literally ending her chances of ever finding a husband at home.
I’ve witnessed this go badly wrong more times than I want to think about. These hot little sex kittens are also real human beings with hopes and dreams. Remember that.
If you want to go on an absolute endless fucking spree, stick with the liberal Indonesian girls in Jakarta, Bali and tourist areas. Find out where to get the best sex massage in Bali and how to meet local Bali women.
They know what they’re getting into and it’s all above-board. Half of them have a list of dozens of expats on their phones anyhow. That way it’s all fair play.
How to Pull Indonesian women
Indonesian women are no different from women the world over when it comes to the how-to. Be funny, tease them, push-pull them, buy them a few drinks, be a gentleman but don’t be weak. It’s the same everywhere in the world and if you don’t know that, you should read up about it.
One thing that is absolutely massive here is text game. You need to be using BBM or an Android or you are missing out on potentially thousands of Indonesian girls. People are glued to their phones here 24/7 to the extent it is like a part of their bodies. To be effective in the dating game you need to be connected.
Apart from that just follow all the normal rules – dress well, be cleaned, brush your molars and make her laugh. The rest is as easy as pie to find yourself a nice Indonesian girl.
Enjoy Yourself But Don’t Be a Sucker
Indonesia is one of the best yet most under rated countries on earth. I was unsure I even wanted to write this. I don’t want people to know about it so I can keep it for myself and the few others who are here.
However here it is.You’ll have more fun here than you can imagine. Just don’t go in like a blind idiot and fall in love with the first hooker you meet at a bar or you’re asking for a world of pain.
Have fun, but as with everywhere in Asia, keep your eyes wide open and I hope you meet hundreds of sexy Indonesian girls. If you think I missed something out please leave a comment below.
If you want to meet sexy Indonesian Girls for free, then check out this article.
Summary of Dating Indonesian Women
You will find whatever you are looking for in a woman here.
It is impossible to generalize this many people, and this is just a rough guide to some common traits I have seen. Indonesian women are all different and every one has their own little trait.
You can find everything from wild party girls who stay up for days taking pills and dancing to traditional Javanese housewives who just want to have children and read the Koran.
They are women like, charming, fun-loving and mostly submissive and care for you.
If you’re thinking of dating an Indonesian woman, keep the above points in mind and give it a go. Life is for the living and generally if you treat them well, they will treat you like a king.
Check out a few dating sites to find the perfect girl for you.
If you want to meet sexy Indonesian Girls for free, then check out this article.
Ultimate Guide To Using Tinder in Indonesia
Indonesian Cupid Review – Getting Girls The Easy Way
hahaa I do agree, but some Indonesian women are not like that.
Totally agree with all points mentioned above!!
What an observation!
I am new in Jakarta and I have no other words to say then ” ABSOLUTELY AGREE”
They have no values at all.!
I’m agree with that!!! hahahaha the part fun is most agree!! yeah maybe if u meet them for the first time, they will look not interest about fun, party, sex but if u know them already they really WILD!!! hahahaha lol..
Married one. Worst decision of my life and my one regret. I was even warned by Indonesians themselves. Im sure there are good women out there but most of the ones I encountered before and since are narcissistic psychopaths. Suck out your soul, spend your money and basically fuck up your life. So gents be careful. Malay women are a much better bet.
Watch out for red flags, if your gut feeling says no, then get out quick.
I married a Chinese woman it started bad but hope was she gets better and she did in one way but bad even later, killed my life and now have a big problem getting rid of her. Not that easy as think as you don’t why. Anyway I am looking now for a new women and this time I will more make sure if somebody is even willing to try to change, willing to learn your language, learning to cook your food etc is all about if somebody wants to learn something new or who find always excuses for anything. This is your part where you should part or your life will become a disaster just like married a western women more or less catastrophic. Money is all they love to talk about always want to go shopping and want to buy brand names and want to eat the best only but home they eat only cheap rice, and cheap garbage dirty greens with nothing else in their food. I know it all and have to agree with you sexually it could have a lot better as well but at least she and other Chinese women have been better when it comes to open end sex for her but don’t use it a lot more rarely so no matter what you self-getting nothing nearly.
Very true. They understand us better than we shall ever understand them. Like Thai they can make you feel very low, and that gives them the opportunity to “raise you up.” That’s known as manipulation. Don’t let them do it. Make them rise to your standards.
Indicators you have a good Indonesian woman (non-Muslim) in your life that you should hold onto and advice for keeping her:
1) She tells you about and asks your permission before engaging in mixed-company social activities (i.e. clubbing with her friends without you—yes, she certainly has many close, male friends that have been in her life long before your ass ever came along)
2) Apologizes for and seeks your acceptance for having opposite sex friends (annoyingly so)
3) She guards her heart close and does not give or declare her affections quickly (be patient and persevere; it will be worth it)
4) She appreciates any tastefully-done, public act of devotion demonstrating her special place in your life (i.e. Facebook status is very important to her and you better include pictures of her)
• caveat: do not do this until 3) above has occurred or you will unleash a shrieking banshee from the nether regions.
5) Do not expect her to have pre-marital sex and always treat her respectfully and sweetly (makes getting it that much more fulfilling sexually)
6) You have to let unpredictability and drama roll off you; otherwise, you’re done—permanently.
7) You must be able to read between the lines or you’ll never understand her feelings towards you
8) You have to demonstrate yourself as being witty, humorous, and able to read between the lines
9) She is not laughing at what you said, but the way it makes her feel—she’ll often laugh when embarrassed or happy
10) Follow her lead in any conversation and do not dwell too long on “serious” topics—she can only handle your uptight, emotionally-dependent personality in small doses
11) She wants you to compliment her and be fawning in your attentions towards her (this doesn’t make her high maintenance, just insecure—most women are after all)
12) Think before you react to any situation—your assumptions and conclusions regarding it are probably incorrect (unless, of course, she’s shagging your best friend and you walk in on them)
Good Luck!
Indonesiens womens are manly good womens , friendly , open minded and fun to get along with i have a lot of good indonesiens womens friends ,but when it comes to relationship i would state that it is a different thing … First of all they are really too much about physical appearances especially when it comes to ” bule ”
For them a man must be tall muscle and have the face of brad pitt if it possible ,, and i barely exxagerate by saying it . They often won’t give a shit about the man’s personnality if it doesn’t fit their physical standard even though the guy is interesting .. as written above by the author they would rather go toward the beefle muscly guy . Second they are in my sense too submisive
For them the man must lead everything , take all the decisions take care of her and her family during this time they would take care to manage the house , manage the budget and bring careness to their mens .. ok right but it lacks of something to make blossom the relation ..
We also need to have some debate sometimes withing the realation , express some kind of different ideas ,, we cannot to be agree about everything .. well most of Indonesiens Womens won’t dare contredict you or say to u anything because you are the MAN ,and if you say that it must be true then they woud follow your opinions even though they are totally disagree . I would add that a “nice ” guy won’t be successfull here
As the author said a man must not to be romantic she would think he is a “pussy ” and not a manly guy but he has to know how to lead his wife and provide security for her and her family .. i think this mentality do not really fit the western mentality, except if the man want to have the total control ,but if you want a balanced relationship better to look away .
@Feb44 most girls are like that
Maybee in USA they are pushy a lot more
But most girls WHILE IN REALTIONSHIP will agree and be submissive, and would stay in a bullying relationship where a man calls her “U are worth nothing” – she starts to believe that, and cant break up with him.
She can have 1000 guys DMing her on instagram but her brain is stuck like that – her BoyFriend is HER, without him shez nothing.
Its actually an article written by american woman (while im also in europe). Me living in Europe is actually hearing from friends/female friends or female friends of my sisters = all the girls in relationship just say as the guy says.
They do as the guy pleases.
They wont argue.
They wont have opinion.
Until, it may or may not happen, usually 99% of time happens: SHE shows her REAL FACE after of 1/3/5/10 years of Realtionships/or even Marriage, she will force u to HATE HER and want to LEAVE HER
U perhaps had short-term few-weeks-2-3months relationships so u only THINK THEY WILL BE SUBMISSIVE FOR LIFE:
Maybe if she dont work anything if her LIFE depends on u, Her Food, Food for her children, but if u go there as a stranger/ u most likely work online/remotely/freelancing if she looks it up and u help her work = she earns money and becomes independent she will throw u like as if u a piece of shit to her.
you are absolutely right mr. Michael D.
if you wanna get good indonesian woman you must be hold on some good rule especially for traditionally educated women.
if you wanna meet some traditional women , you must go out from big city like jakarta, bandung or bali. try to visit this city : yogyakarta, solo. or if you wanna find something interesting women, you can go to SUMATRA, they are have different etnic from javanese or bali. cause most of them are like malay
regards
indonesian womens.
Michael D. what u just said is exactly what 100% of the women around the WORLD GLOBALLY are.
ANd anyways 10-20% of things u say, if guys keep it, again ANYWHERE in the world, will stay virgins.
U live once, one day u die, and u keep her UNTIL MARRIAGE? Ok.
Like she doesnt want sex, she never masturbated? She never thinks about sex with me? THEN LEAVE. If u are not that smart and are stupid enough to follow ur rules/cultures of no-sex then U LIVE IN THE WRONG WORLD, or have TOO LOW IQ which turns me OFF anyways, about any woman.
I mean falling in love is to be HURT,so she better enjoy it while it lasts.
This is deeper and rarely who understands it…
…If she falls in love MORE THAN ME, she has higher chances of getting hurt and me leaving, while if she left – i wouldn’t be hurt -but she wont leave if shes LOVING ME
So if i LOVE HER MORE, if she leaves = i WIll be hurt.
So waiting until marriage is like u never lived on planet Earth.
This fake life is meant to chase good emotions and feel them.
What a thought, Mr. Michael!
Very well-said and wise words.
I am Indonesian woman. And i’m proud to say that my man (which is white one-bule) is respect me at all.
He never ask for sex (yes, we’re not marry yet) because he knows that in Indonesia, it would be illegal.
He respects me and my family also.
He go to church with me every week.
He calls for my Mom and Dad, and sometimes had a deep conversation with my sister & brother.
He brings his family from Europe just to met my parents.
He sometimes spent some money to buy me a flower, a flight ticket, a ring, even a car before we’re marry simply just to say that i am worth to lived with-in the future..
There are a few things we keep in our life (me & my Man) :
1. You’ll get what you deserve. Your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/ are simply a reflection of your life.
2. Respect people, and you’ll respected by them.
3. Karma is real. Life is just like a boomerang; what you give, you get.
Thank you and have a bless day!
I meet an Indonesian Woman from Bandung. For like 2.5 years things went good at first but things got little sketchy. All those ” family problems” turn out that she was seeing other guys. Later found out she was giving B.J to some guy from Albania. And saw her say ” love you” in her language. I know she was divorced by her husband few years back due to cheating to him. Even though she was pretty but so stupid at the same time I found out all her shadiness. Just because She profess to be Muslim doesn’t mean she is holier then thou. Behind scenes She’s a undercover slut. All keep it low profile. Not all Indonesian woman are like this but be very careful Men.
Its crazy. I think you talk about my gf!!!
She is a Whore……I knew few of her friends but I find out one of her friends did the same she is also Sundanese who married a Chinese guy but now She cheated her Ex-Husband for a Bule ( you know*). Her Rich friends go for Bule and married them. At least they are happy ( unless they also see other dudes). I saw her some time ago boy she is showing off her gold jewelry and her very expensive car, of course, she still drives her mortal bike. I told her close friends about her only one had compassion. She seems to be from some type of band. I remember always hear how much they hate the Dutch mistreatment on the natives and Chinese. Back when Indonesia was called ” Dutch East Indies” but at least the Dutch people were more disciplined with their Catholic/Calvinist type tradition marriages. And hold it with honor compare to even back then this Indonesian woman was known to have affairs with their husbands back. No wonder the Dutch despised them reputations count a long way, of course, the Dutchmen fuck Indonesian woman and creating Indo-People ( mutts). Indonesian woman weakness is lust and money with None-Indonesian Men. I remember her hating* Indonesian men for some odd reason, in fact, she beat up a few of them for flirting her and yet she will suck a cucumber to a Bule such hypocrisy. sorry, you reply you late but I learn an available lesson once again silly of me for loving a slut from Bandung, Indonesia. Besides her pussy smells like hot tuna fish with cottage cream.
I’m just going there, first time already have a date set with great looking and a lot younger lady, she’s giving a hint that she’s in for serious relations but all the “red flags” are up already as she seem to have a lot of activities ongoing… Anyway I’m in for experience or and fun anything else is bonus. Any hints what to do and what are the things to do or don’t…
Nice, keep us updated on what happens!
I had an well-educated Indonesian girlfriend living/working in Macao.
We knew each other from a dating site. She pretended that she was single living alone. After a few months talking every day I got really feelings for here. After 1 year we made a roundtrip trough Java. From Jakarta to Bali. Everything was awesome and I was totally in love.
After being back in Europe and she back to Macao a guy added me on FB. I though hmmm okay I don’t know him but hey a new friend from Macao.
After a while he send me a message on FB and found out that this guys was the boyfriend of my girlfriend who was still living with her together for 8 years……….
Damnnnn my dream world collapse on that moment. I was devastated by knowing this. Never thought the she could do this to a honest person who was loving her so much and wanted to give her a good live here.
That was here first big lie. After a while I gave her a second chance but was always afraid what next.
A year was passing by with more small lies where she denied all even having proved.
It’s really scary to have a relationship with someone who is really believing in their lie.
Still I know there are a lot of good decent Indonesian woman’s out there.
Thanks for sharing Jack. It’s better to have love and lost than never loved at all.
Excellent article! Bali here I come!
Just a small quibble. Don’t ever believe that these girls are only interested in white guys. It is delusional. How do I know? I am brown and have not managed to find any guy (foreigner) with a hotter gf than mine. in 10 years and counting. I also live in Asia and when am out an about, no shortages of girls. Prior to my current gf, I have had some seriously hot asian gfs and I always have the Asian boys joke in mind when I dated them…no way would I be seen dead with a broke, lower class asian girl. Asian boys like to joke that foreigners can have those.Bet you know this?
Another thing. When you are always paying, it is not manly. You are being made to pay as you go. Heed Jack’s warning.
I know many Indonesian women for ages, all are either married or engaged or with Boy friends and then having secret affairs with other guys too. They are so characterless that they even have no shame to trap a married guy and ruin the lives of other women. I heard stories from their mouths and they fight like bitches for husbands and boy friends of other women. Its not only about good looks they are easily accessible if you are white and have lots of money. They show themselves submissive but the reality comes after marriage and you will see how indirectly they will become your master. Very cunning and clever women to make people dumb in all relationships. Religion does not play any role in Indonesia, its about race and whether she is a Muslim with hijab or Christian in skirt all are same. I know Christian lady who became Muslim to divorce her husband to get a white guy as quickly as possible and I know a Muslim in hijab granny having affair with one guy while her children and husband see her most modest character in family. One thing what I hate about these superficial women are they play a victim and knows well how to pretend to be most vulnerable and innocent. They will burn you, bully you and if you say they were wrong they will immediately apologize and wont argue BUT wait after sometimes they will stab you bigger than before and again will immediately say sorry. Never trust when they say sorry as they never meant it, its just to make you fool and shut you up. If you want to ruin your sincere love and trust or a friendship then go for these women otherwise world is big take any women of any part you will have best companion or friend out there but never trust Indonesian woman, that’s my sincere advice.
SK tells the most truth here:.. “They are so characterless that they even have no shame to trap …… and ruin the lives of others…. They show themselves submissive but the reality comes after marriage and you will see how indirectly they will become your master. Very cunning and clever women to make people dumb in all relationships…. these superficial women play victim and they know well how to pretend to be most vulnerable and innocent.”. (it is like you come under a spell)
“They will burn you, bully you and if you say they were wrong they will immediately apologize and wont argue BUT wait after sometimes they will stab you bigger than before and again will immediately say sorry. Never trust when they say sorry as they never meant it, its just to make you fool and shut you up. If you want to ruin your sincere love and trust or a friendship then go for these women…” (you can also be corrupted by them)
Heed the warning about Indonesian women… you can be very much like prey getting caught in a spiders web.
Totally agree with S.K
I’m Indonesian woman and I can’t even deny your outburst. It’s sad that any of you might get the bad treatments from my fellow folks, I’ll apologize for their wrongdoings. They are just being a human, and a women. Don’t be too hard on them.
Hehe, don’t worry I bet some of us deserve the bad treatment because guys aren’t always so great either :).
I really feel sorry to those heart-broken Bule men who involved with wrong Indonesian Women. I know those kind of women, met them, and as Indonesian woman I do feel ashamed by their behaviours. But come on, not all Indonesian women are that bad. Please don’t generalised. And dont be too confident, not all of Indonesian women fond of white-men. Many of us think that these Bule only want to have fun, sex, party, and that stereotype attracts mostly the gold-digger or the bad women whom some of Bule here met. And many of Indonesian women think that culture and religion differences are matters! Thats why many of us also think that It will be easier to have relationship with a man who has same culture and religion background. And love-affair, well, it exists in all society! You just need to be aware what kind of woman you are involving with.
I agree with that!
This stereotype not only applied for Indonesian women. Same goes for Bule that goes to a night club, bars, etc. As an Indonesian woman, I go to a bar to have fun with my girl friends. Dancing and all. And apparently some of those Bule bars or clubs are a good place to chill with friends; doesn’t mean I go there to hook up with Bule. But almost all Bules over there already have this stereotype about Indonesian women and go trying their chances, thinking am that stereotype of Indonesian women, it’s disgusting for me.
Knowing that Bules think that way about Indonesian women, to objectify them, it makes me sick. And knowing many Indonesian women have no value, objectify themselves, it’s also a very screwed fact. I see them and laugh inside thinking of what a circus show being shown. This is ofc a piece of thought in context of looking at life in general.
This becomes a very classic pattern and now I dont visit those places as much, knowing that people over there mostly have an issue with moral hazard. But aside from my opinion here, I believe there are still many good Bules and Indonesian women that could share the same value, although the chances are not that high. So please read my opinion as one of those Indonesian women, as their thought about Bule and other Indonesian women as well.
Sorry about those Bules’ coming over there running amuck makes me sick seeing that. Fat slobs,losers, it’s cringe seeing them drunk, their bad behaviour. No respect for the culture or people living there. Most Bules are fairly decent from what i can see, it seems the drop kicks head to places like Bali and such.
I agree with your point of views
My ex boyfriend cheated on my with a Jakarta girl who has a son already . The girl is so young like 21yrs old. She slept with my ex the second days asked him for a baby
Yet she hasn’t divorced with her husband. And she is Muslim
I feel ashamed of her.
And she messaged and their lovely photos towards me telling me how much my ex boyfriend loves her and doesn’t want to lose her with their photos
Childish girl i dont give a shit to reply her
Now they are in a relationship
My Australian ex boyfriend is planning to buy house in Indonisia to have a happy ever after with her
God blessed them for a bright future
Wah it seems you truly had a bad experience with indonesian woman
Probably what’s happening is the bule falls in love after sex, not realising the women who are likely to have sex soon are gold diggers, and then he naively tries to wife up the ho.
But that’s a paradox as she’s into the sex and will naturally be banging more than one dude until she finds one that ticks all her boxes, including that box down under and the deposit box in Bank of Indonesia
I absolutely agreed with this statement,, I tried to date a young woman from distance that I met online, she’s in Jakarta and I’m in United States, she has many males friends, she tried her best to get my heart, but it was a trap, since she uses to complains about her financial condition, she tried to make me feel sorry for her in order to get my money. I knew something wasn’t right and every time I tried to understand, she pulled away for days and sometimes weeks without calling and locked her phone to avoid contact, and then came back later when she realized I missed her. Indonesia woman knows how to get to a man emotions, it didn’t end up well, be careful to women called Dewi Novita sari sihombeing
Sorry .. I am as an Indonesian woman feeling very sad to read all these comments .. And believe me not all Indonesian women “heartbroken of bule” if you want a good Indonesian woman look for them in a village that is still obedient to culture and religion … who will never have a man Others after having men…
I am very sad to see all the comments, not all Indonesian women like that. There are still many good Indonesian women, do not just because they are like that so you think that Indonesian women are very bad, do not look for good Indonesian women in the club, look for women inside the village, you will know a true nature of Indonesian women, Not only the village even in the city also many Indonesian women who behave politely
I met last summer an indonesian girl very nice, very clever and very funny. She had a lot of money so i didnt worry about her and about hidden motivations!!!
She quickly say “i love u” and the relationship was very intense. Everything was fine. We kept in touch after going back to my country. I was so in love and my dream to move in Indonesia could come true with her.
But after, in long distance relationship, i discover many things. FIrst, she was really wild in party dancing with guys almost naked and very drunk. She goes out only in gay club. I was already very upset but i knew her friends, all “bencong” very crazy and funny also.
Then, she was working as model. And one month after, she had to go to Singapore for work. And then no news for 3 days!!! I worried so much. No firends of her were upset by this. I decided to call hospital and police by mail from my country. I received mail from police asking me very strange questions. That push me to simply take a look on google. I wrote her name and her pseudo with some keys words like drugs, escort or scamming. I discovered very easely she was escort since a while in SG, HK, Macao, KL and Jakarta. She was arrested in SG for illegal escort activities. I discovered also drugs dealing and scamming in her background. My world collapsed!!!! I discover then all her friends, all w “bule” were the same. All cheating their bf even if they stop her escort activities and have a “normal job”!!!! My god!!!! She was linked with Laskar Bali for her protection and scam or more with annoying guys for her.
Of course, we didnt put condoms after a while cause she introduced her as a genuine girl almost virgin and very shy. I did all tests and all negative!!!
Guys, listen my advice. If ur girl have money without working a lot, 2 phones and hidding them, if sometimes they dont give news for some hours with always network problems, bencong friends and club addicts…Run away!!!!!
I feel sorry for you,but tell you the truth you can’t find a good Indonesian women in a club ,ever.Only bad women will do that,even not all…
Simply my suggestion… Never find a wife material in a bar….
Decent Indonesian woman dont drink…dont do one night stand…dont have sex with other man…
We may need a wealthy man to make sure of our family future… But not that greedy..
So find better place to meet one of Us… I am sorry for those who find wrong population of our woman…
Why u say i met her in club? I met her in restaurant!
well, for all of you guys who really wants to run a serious relationship with indo,you better never fall in love with Indonesian girl who loves to party or even met them in a club cause mostly once indonesian girl being wild they would be more wild than western but i believe there are so many kind Indonesian girl. the most important point is to hear, listens, and respect them
I married a fake Christian Chinese-Indonesian woman and it was the biggest mistake I made in my life. I will likely divorce her because even though she is pretty she is not worth the ongoing fighting. I married a pretty demon lady and suggest if you plan to marry an Indonesian woman pay pay pay for a complete through background check on her. Make sure you get everything on her including her social websites. My wife is a raving bitch and a liar as I uncover her past layer by layer. It appears she was a golf digger or a fucking high paid prostitute.
How many months did you get to know her before you married her. If you spend 2 years with any girl you’ll know what type of person they are, often people get married way too fast.
I am Indonesian woman, born in Java island (Sundanese ethnic) and that is only factor of DURY because no one can choose to be born “from, where, and by whom”. I am married to Indonesian men, ethnic Chinese. This is my experience for 17 years of marriage until now, twice I have been betrayed, and if one day I decided to go / divorce it is not because I am revenge but, because “myself”. Everyone must have done something wrong. My advice if you are interested in a woman / man (from any country). Look and treat as a human being. And every human being has a positive and a negative side. If they match each other, run. If it does not fit, leave it. And every human has a “wild side” within him. I am not a perfect woman, and no one is perfect in this world. And I am not a religious person (I have no religion).
You guys are racists,why should always women to be the first thing in observation,I’am an Indonesian man is hoping to be treated the same like women ,and I wish western women and Balkan especially from Ukraine ,Checnya, or Russia could hear my sigh as a lone single guy who really need love and affection from beautiful “bule” strangers .c’mon try and taste Indonesian “hot”men and find a different things of it..
i live together with indonesia wooman,for about 4 years,.we know each othars for about 5-6 years,before we decide to live together,.can you bellive me i regret when i decide to live together,with indonesian wooman,.the first at all,she dont like to work,.second she dont do any job in apartemnet we live,.the third she dont like sex,att all? what t the most strange,.all her daily life she spending reading bible book,.we dont talk anything about life,future,traveling,etc,.i decide and i told her that she must go,from me,i dont want to have ghost in my apartemnet,.its better to be alone than living with ghost,.i bean in realtinonship with some asian wooman,like philippina,japanese,malay,chinese,.but i did not have strange relationship like this living with indoenesian wooman,strange relationship,.i told her couple weeks ago she must go,from me,i would like to be happy alone,.this indonesian wooman,dont have any clue about love,to be loved,or to love,she is most boring wooman i ever met in my life,.i regret again,being with her wasting my time,.
I just confused with all negative comments. Come on boys. Did you realize you all being so judgemental. Every human ( indonesian girl is human) has different personality, some positive and some negative. And your problem is met wrong girl but don’t being so judgemental and said “Indonesian womans are bla bla bla” cause is not fair and stupid at all. Just open your mind. It’s like saying ” western girls are careless and work is everything, but we knew the truth is not all of them!”.
Regards
Indonesian woman
I honestly disagree with all this crap man whom to be utterly judgementally over Indonesian women, I am Indonesian myself and lived in western country and am sure neither all Indonesian women are like that and I have worked very hard to earned for living and born of noblemen family and yet their no better as a western man just a user living on my money , so there as to my knowledge his a bum. I think every nationality has it traits just because you’ve come across with the brinksmanship that doesn’t mean all are bad.Happy hunting guys go for the best not lust.
This article is bullshit. I am married to an Indonesian. First off, My wife’s family tried to convert me to Islam. I told them to shove it and that they should convert to my religion if they want to play that game. She married me anyway. No, they wont leave you if you do not convert and play their 3rd world mentality game. You have money, they will stay with you provided you spend it on them. Money is first, everything else is second. I see it time and time again with my wife, her friends, and in Indonesians in general. Indonesian women are a mixed bag when it comes to western man. If you are broke forget it. Wont happen. If you have money, they will flock over to you. Its not the western looks its the money.
While very pretty, she has no manners. No shame. Superficial. Is bitchy, farts anywhere and everywhere. The term “bule” is very offensive and is meant to be offensive to westerners. Indonesians, like many 3rd world countries, have double standards. Don’t dare be racist or bigoted to them, but they will be racist and bigoted to you constantly.
The Indonesian women have little to no real self discipline. Typical 3rd world mentality. they do not clean, they hate work, very rarely complete anything they start, smile to your face and stick you in the back. Indonesia is corrupt and trashy for a reason. You sure you want one as a wife? I would dump mine, but I love my kids to much.
I can’t comment on most things, but there are girls who are not after your money. There are lots and lots of Indonesian girls who don’t just care about money, but there are lots who do CARE about money too.
Disagree with all negative stereotypes written here. I am Indonesian myself, and you are definitely wrong to say that we only care about your money and all of us have those third world mentality- It is obvious that you met the wrong person. Even among us, we dislike these pathetic bule-hunters because we know that they are disloyal, uneducated and hypocrites. So it is unfair to say that Indonesian women are the same. Educated, religious and well-raised women won’t do the above things- and some of them even are not interested in your money and you-being a bule- because we believe that women of purity are for men of purity and vice versa.
Helo Sir. Apa Kabar?
As Indonesian woman i will say that basically there are 2 types of women.
1. The one that author mention.
2. The one that will suck ur money out.
If u meet her in a place where alcohol or beer is served there, with loud music play by dj or else, there will be 90% chances that they are the 2nd type. But there is also 10% they will be 1st type.
😉
Regards.
I am Indonesian women live in Central Java and i agree with you. In Indonesia, more and more well educated and independent women can be a good choice. Of course moral is the most important thing in finding the other half.
get a woman in your own country !these daddy’s/dickheads that go overseas to the so called promise land seem to lose common sense,i have seen so many do this and when it all turns to shit they piss and moan and forget the warnings they have had,do you really think you can pull a woman out of a club/ strip joint and marry her and it will be happily ever after?wake you fool’s and stop letting the little head make the decisions, she is not a trophy,there are good and bad women in every country,don’t blame them blame yourself for being a fool!!! have a good look at yourself!
I spent with her five days .. she orderd from me.. a new mobile i brought her the mobile when i cam back to jakarta after 2 month .. i gave to her the mobile smamsung galxy s5 .she very happy so much.. kissed me and huged me and gave me beatiful night on bed never forget… she told me only me in her life .. she dont know that mobile i gave to her is bugged with spying app.(flexy spay). I travelld back to my country.. i opend my computer and loged in to my account ..strating tracing her calls and sms whats app bbm.. and gps locations… most of it in pahasa indo me no understand at all some times i go to google traslations.. after few weeks she starts chating in whats app and dating in english with another men … i called her .. she say to me i love u only so much… only u in my life only u i loved..i knew she is a big laier.. me ran from her for ever…
Dude that is just weird, why the hell would you bug a girl’s phone? You need to sort your own trust issues out even if she did chat with other guys.
Seriously? I would be careful to call it ‘trust issues’. Clearly, the man had a point. – I should have done that, looking back. I found out after marriage – that she had dating profiles and plenty of men.
For broken hearted Bule, felt sorry for you. Next you should try to find woman from other place rather than cheap bar, or clubbing place. Try to find them on linkedin or professional meet up instead. Most of indonesian woman who has career and educated, will not bother you with exploiting your money nor cheat on you. I am indonesian woman, thank god I work with well… quite a decent salary. I am okay with going dutch with my current German (super polite) boyfriend. And i dont even think wanted to find other guy, i dont have big heart to share. And I met my BF at a formal MBA meet up in Singapore. So, goodluck guys!
Chiv, I’d love to know more about you!
I could not agree more. My fiancee and I have know each other a long time and are getting married next month. She has worked in Obstretics for 17 years and now teaches at universities around Indonesia. She is the sweetest , kindest, and most definitely the hottest lady I have ever known. She not only has never asked me for a dime is shy to accept it even if freely offered. I love her daughter of 20 as my own. Our loving little family treat each other with kindness, understanding, and so much love. Best life decision ever made.
Bule ( so sorry to call you like that ) .. I found this article …. I’m indonesian women , I feel to much shy to read it . Not all Indonesian women like that, if you know them from the Roadside Or clubbing may be just like that you get. For us actually respecting husband And serving husband is number one. And we just need “one love of my live” . And love is not for fun dear … Alhamdulillah , I have good educations and Im working good in hallal way . I’m nurse working in the hospital in U.K , It all depends on where you meet… ??? A good woman will not be easy to find in the road .
Thanks for the post, I agree with you 100%.
Hello Sir’… I am indonesian wonan and I am a painter. Not all Indonesian women like that. Most of you always find them in clubbing , restaurant or ect the bad place. that’s the problem. It will happens in any country, my country, including your country. Dont judge women in the world, if you need a good woman, find them in the good place,in the right place! Good Luck
Well said!
I’m an indonesian woman. In the village you will meet a lot of innocent and low education girls. They are very faithful in love and mostly can’t speak in English . They wake up very early to cook breakfast, wash your clothes and clean your house. They care and love you perfectly. I live in village and I know as well. A lot of wives work hard to help her their husband. She takes foods after her children and husband. She is respectfully to her husband. Moreover if you are responsibility man, she will treat you like a king. I guarantee you will get the faithful wife! And I belive who talk negatively, they didn’t ever meet the village girls like me. hahaha…
For education girls they have more knowledge and may they will increase the criteria and understand that finacial os one most important thing in marriage, university girls are like to deal with make up hehehe. I think this is fine, because I also do make up on my face.
And for indonesian girls who are in the bar and clubs … most of them are B****.
This is a good article and I realized you know indonesian well and much, I am impressed. The generalization is indeed can’t be done in a good or bad way because they are human who has totally different characteristic, mind, goal, and view. It is the same with women in your country, not all are nice and not all are bad.
But honestly, some of your writing are correct, especially when it comes that bule is always been attractive for them. It’s not racist indeed, it’s true. I don’t know also why they always been so damn like a stupid person when see white fellas.
Nearly all Indo women are attracted to white men or bule. It’s hard to contest that – they adore pale white skin, thanks to Hollywood and Korean culture etc.
I’ve met people from all over the world. I have to be honest and say that Indonesian women are the most emotionally weak and you have to deal with all of that. Listening to the many apologies and loss self esteem due to abusive parents and family members.
You do not have rights in Indonesia to be honest. You have to show honour and avoid shame, and they are much more important to Indonesians than justice and rights. In other words, you become a slave to your wife or husbands family members.
Sorry but I have seen MANY lives ruined by the simple village women, and the bule hunters. The women are treated poorly by their family members, so then they treat their boyfriends or husbands badly.
I met a woman from Bandung. We were having sex but she said it’s OK. O just want to be your indo wife while you here. When she met my sister who had rich friends she became pregnant. My sister said her plan was so obvious it was tattooed on her fore head. I wasn’t sure so I married her. Now she has kicked me out of my house in Bali and rents it while collecting her salary in Bandung. She has made no attempt to live with me in seven years. I have no wife no kid and no villa. This woman has a high level of education and a good job. She can’t sell the villa but expects me to just sign it over. She constantly harasses me my family and my friends with every kind of social media. As an old man around 65 it’s so hard to understand what she wants. I met a lawyer who said that your wife is a pure scammer. It shocked me but once the plans and modus operandi were fully explained to me I have accepted it. Do not expect to meet a normal woman in Bali especially when she is from another island. She is a fly in fly out. No matter how intelligent, pretty or sweet you will find she is cunning, conniving and wicked. Without any kind of moral balance. Do not have anything to do with them. If you say, Oh I have a villa in Bali you won’t have it for long I guarantee you. Cheers
Sounds like brutal story, if all true she could be a sociopath. I’d like to put out to anyone reading this that not all girls in Indonesia are like this, just a small %.
Get her to pay you some money to sign over the villa, she’ll probably get the next bule to pay it but anyway, cut your losses and run
Distinguishing good and bad women in Indonesia is easy, most Indonesian women are attracted to western men is normal. Actually Indonesian women are good and not well balanced. 50% and 50% good and bad. It’s just that a good woman is not too much in the likes of western men. Indonesian women may just smile and just want to take pictures with him, because there is a large boundary that separates for a marriage. So if it really loves an Indonesian woman is easy, go to Islam to the woman’s parents and ask permission marriage and responsible do not hurt woman if she wrong.
My message. The woman is basically weak. Either who your soul mate is from asia or europe or america or africa or australia do not ever hit him. Because basically the man is strong, do not be a sissy
What the fuck western man, you want to war with me. You are playboy, in your mind just sex, lady, happy, money, fooding.
I met an Indonesian girl in Bandung while I was on holiday in Bali. She was really beautiful and promised me that she was looking for marriage. I then booked a ticket for her to travel to Philippines and after that met her in her city. She has sex with me but only days later, when I arrived back to my country she was engaged with someone else. Becareful
Indonesian women are truly sluts and it looks like the husband’s not parents dont mind it. My man is trapped by this bitch( yes, entirely his fault not hers), she knows how to grab money out of him- he has none of his own and uses my savings! Yet gives impression that it’s Love and not money her goal- imagine even when she is breastfeeding his child she sends videos to my man! She makes her kids gives kisses to him on video and this pussy of my man becomes pulp and genuinely believes that only love is in the air. I have tried forcing him to go to her permanently which both don’t want- she hapoy in the safety net of family and can fool around, he is hapoy cheating on me just because I am financially stronger!
I think you just met the wrong girl, they are not all like that.
I like your article, but it is not “technically illegal” to have premarital sex in Indonesia. It is perfectly legal federally — it really depends on what province and city you live in. If you live in Aceh or Yogjakarta, yes, you may be caned for premarital sex. But in Bali, Bandung, and Jakarta it is perfectly legal, though it may be frowned upon socially.
What you run into are families that use the fear of it being illegal to convince their daughters not to have premarital sex. And that’s how the rumors get started.
In 2018, there was a discussion of introducing a new law that would ban it, but to my knowledge, it was not passed.
Also, Indonesia is not a “Muslim” nation. It is a mostly secular nation with some Muslim-based laws due to its vast Muslim population. Not too unlike the U.S. where some laws have loose basis in Christianity.
WOW!!! I am so glad that I ran across this website. I have been married to an Indo girl from Cianjur for almost 10 years. She acts exactly like how you gentlemen have described above. I remember clearing have such a high impression of her before we got married. She would never take a dime from me before we said I do. However, now she steals money from me like a gangster. She can always justify her poor attitude and behavior with her flippant attitude. She never is wrong and can say whatever she wants to say to me. But if I make her mad she stops giving you sex, and refuses to cook your food. I cannot count how many times she would get mad over something seemingly so trivial. But now after listening to your stories, I am more convinced than ever that she has always been unfaithful to me. I would send her back to Indonesia every year for vacation. She would always find a reason to pretend that she was upset, and then would refuse to answer my phone calls. I am sure that is when she would be out with other men. To make things worst she even got pregnant by another man, and tried to convince me it was mines. I tried my best to leave her in Indonesia so I could divorce her while I was in the States. However, like so many of you have mentioned they are cruel and cunning beasts. She stole 2000 from account and bought a plane ticket to get back to America. She made false reports to the American police to get me in trouble and to control me. I was asking her about what she was doing with the money and then she started to yell at me. Then when I tried to calm her down she lied and said I pushed her and made a report to the hospital. She bullied me to buy a home, and then started to threaten to divorce. She knows in America she would get half. Yet she does not want to work. And once she did get a part time job she doesn’t use her money for my household. She only thinks about her family back home. Someone mentioned that the families abuse them and they in turn abuse you….no truer words have ever been spoken. Her poor desperate parents made her and her sisters become maids in Saudi Arabia. She was brutally raped but still felt obligated to continue to work for the family. I could go on forever. But what these guys are saying is 100% fact. Buyer beware and STAY AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sounds like hell.
I have to second all of the nightmarish posts above regarding SOME Indonesian women. I know all aren’t bad, but the ones that drink in bars, smoke and generally dispense with their traditions to seek out a white guy are playing a very clever and narcissistic game designed to suck all the blood, life and resources out of the unlucky victim. Be seriously awake, sober and lucid when dealing with them, as they have a seduction and allure which is designed to be irresistible. They will shower you with admiration and affection from the outset, by being sexually provocative and energetic. This drive comes from an innate desire to subdue the victim whereupon they can exercise control. They will also steamroller through others to get to their objective, whether that means manipulating a divorce or destroying a family. They stop at nothing, completely NPD, never wrong and will make fake apologies while plotting something else to rip you apart. Short, THEY CANNOT BE TRUSTED. Either as friends or partners. Run far far away if you want to protect your sanity and human virtues.
Let me give you an example. I dated a woman such as this for 2.5 years, who appeared to be emotionally vulnerable after a separation and divorce from her husband of 8 years. She created a narrative of how he had cheated on her with prostitutes (twice), but she had heroically returned to him on both occasions and “forgiven him”. There was no way to verify this information as at the time, I didn’t have any contact with him, and didn’t know him. However, her story was that she left, and left all her stuff behind, moved into a cheap shared flat and severed contact with him. I believed this story, she acted so hurt and emotionally in need of comfort and support. So I gave it to her. She told me she couldn’t have children, but when I asked her had she ever had a medical check about it she became really evasive and refused to have it checked out. She was also a heavy drinker, dressed provocatively and was highly sexed, but I thought these were just rebound symptoms from a failed marriage (I.e. she was going a bit crazy). Something prevented me from committing to her even though I was single at the time and living in a foreign country (she was also living outside Indonesia having left there 10 years before with a “massage” qualification), so I guess I was vulnerable too. Anyway, something prevented me from committing to her so soon, and she began pressing for it. She wanted to move in together to a bigger place (I would pay for it of course) even though I already had a high-end spacious apartment. She kept talking about a ring, but I delayed, however I did travel to Bali twice to meet her family. I stayed in an expensive hotel there, but she wouldn’t introduce me to her mother and extended family. I just met her brother, who seemed like a nice guy, but there was definitely a vibe between the two of them – like they were on a mission. Her father had apparently passed away when she was a child, and her brother was living in her small house in Denpasar. I loved Bali, and overlooked these red flags at the time, instead I brought her to stay with me at high end hotels and restaurants throughout the country, even touring with her. Her brother came and met us at a hotel once with a portfolio of a property he wanted me to see. I had expressed an interest in building something, but really it would take a lot of planning and financial support to achieve this. Plus of course, the deeds would be in their name, as foreigners cannot own or purchase land in Bali in their own name. I saw the property and said I would think about it.
Meanwhile, her friends in the Middle East were married to much older banker men who had divorced their wives. These women always had Gucci bags, expensive shoes, very well kept, but you could see the whole thing was a sham. These sad white old men paying for dolls who didn’t care two hoots about them. Just all about money and ultimately getting their name on the inheritance, rather than their divorced wives.
After that, the game continued, to pressure me into buying property in Bali, which her brother would manage. I was a little unsure and wanted more time, and eventually she snapped. A totally different side was exposed – she wanted a villa and a ring now, nothing else would do. Suddenly the affectionate, smiling Indonesian beauty was replaced with an angry, parasitic witch. The spell was starting to wear off. So we separated. And just six months later she was living with a married US navy guy who was on tour in the Middle East, and began creating the same spell. She more or less forced him to divorce a wife who was suffering from cancer and with whom he had two children. Bear in mind this is just six months after discussing a ring with me. Again she pretended to be so hurt and emotionally lost to entice a new guy. She also went drinking a lot and let him drink whenever he wanted, which is something his wife didn’t approve of during their marriage. The guy is now living in the USA, and probably thinks she is some sort of demi-goddess, but she is merely looking for a green card it’s pretty apparent that he represents an easier and better deal for her. It’s disgusting what these women do, it’s pure prostitution – but it’s a deeper game, preying on weak men who are separated from their families working and living abroad. She is still in the ME and drinks heavily, has multiple sexual partners, while feigning this supposed fiancée act to the guy in the USA. The almost schizophrenic change in her personality is frightening, it’s like she is pre-programmed to destroy everything in pursuit of her goal.
I was lucky, in that I was protected from going deeper into a total minefield, I could have lost everything – but I decided to write this as a warning to anyone contemplating dating an Indonesian woman. Be very very careful – the bad ones are highly deceitful and play the victim/innocence card deftly, without concern for your feelings or emotions. They are the ultimate at identifying your weaknesses and using them against you when the time is right.
I’ve often thought about revenge, and how I can eradicate people like this from the planet, but they are masters of manipulation and manage to convince those around them that their actions are innocent, when really they’re designed to seduce, entrap and feed.
WOW! Man you made me laugh so much! And I never comment on the blog posts but I had to comment on this one. I myself come to Bali 6 months ago and I fall in love with the first Indonesia hooker at the bar but in my defense I didn’t know that she was a hooker and I never read online stuff about girls in general… (I always think I know everything) Anyways, I managed to get out somehow as her friend but I would say she is still in dangerous zone. You are telling 100% true. I was and still am a bit in pain of the world… As someone wrote here they can suck out your soul and that is not a joke! But you bring me a peace of mind! I can’t thank you enough and if you are still in Bali it would be my honor to meet you! 😀 May you always have the best! Darian
Wow all of this is so true. I read all the post and all so true. My first wife was from Thailand and was married for 23 yrs good wife good mother and now a good friend. I was married to a Indo woman for 14 years in terror never knew what to expect day by day. I could write all day and tell you stories hard to believe. It was the worst mistake i ever made. i knew she had mental issues and so did all of my friends. They do not believe in mental health care. Her being a muslim believes if you have mental issuesit is Allah whispering in her ear and you rid it by praying more